iPod rumors build as Apple convention draws near

"Hold onto your butts." - Samuel L. Jackson as Ray Arnold

The possibility of a new iPod generation. Internet forums (and the stock market, apparently) react to this kind of information with Jurrassic Park-level intensity, crossing the fingers they hope will soon grace a touchscreen. Why putting ones greasy digits to a slick, easily-smearable surface is considered brilliant, I don't know, since mall shoe stores have had a handle on such technology since the '80s.

"Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should."
- Jeff Goldblum as Dr. Ian Malcolm

Either way, Apple's got something to say on Sept. 5 -- the Wall Street Journal reports that professional analysts and rumor sites alike believe a new iPod will be the first based on Apple's operating system. Nanos, meanwhile, may increase storage capability, since Flash memory now comes in larger sizes. Recently, a sketchy-looking photo surfaced revealing a stockier Nano (for wide-screen capabilities), which Apple lawyers seem to have confirmed as legit, claiming it was "stolen" from the company.

"You did it. You crazy son of a bitch, you did it."
- Malcolm

Meanwhile, an unnamed source tipped off the New York Post about Apple's development of a ringtone service that would "allow users to turn almost any song sold through iTunes into a ringtone for an additional fee." It adds, "iPhone users will have the ability to choose any part of the song they want as their ringtone." Hopefully, it will be a better deal than those provided by most Wireless carriers, for which buying the right to play ten seconds of a track through speakers the size of rice grains costs almost three times as much as downloading the full MP3.

"They're moving in herds. They do move in herds!" - Anyone observing the Apple geeks at next week's event.

Got news tips for Paste? Email news@pastemagazine.com.