Chuck Klosterman writes 1,700 words on Chinese Democracy

Of the two speeches given at the Soldier's National Cemetery dedication in 1863, it's Lincoln's 272-word Gettysburg Address that far eclipses the memory of Edward Everett's 13,607-word firebrand oration from only moments earlier. The lesson? Terser formats capture attention. It's a fact we see reverberate through the many listicles of our lives.

But Chuck Klosterman is having none of it. Says the author and pop culture critic: Verbose is the new memorable.

Since detailing his teenage metal obsession in 2001's Fargo Rock City, Klosterman has often written about the genre, including mentions of it in all five of his books. And now, only two years after writing a satirical piece for Spin on Guns N' Roses' Chinese Democracy, he's crafted a real 1,700-word review for the Onion's A.V. club on the mythical work, which will finally see official release on Sunday after spending almost 17 years in the making.

Mythical indeed, as Klosterman's piece begins: "Reviewing Chinese Democracy is not like reviewing music. It's more like reviewing a unicorn."

We'll let you read it to learn what he decides (okay, he likes it) by clicking here. But there's more analysis and humor in this than you could shake a Gibson Flying V at, so don't just get the notes from a classmate.

Related links:
Review: Chuck Klosterman - Downtown Owl
Review: Chuck Klosterman - Killing Yourself to Live
Ctl-V: On Chinese Democracy's first single

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