The New Ghostface Record Makes Us Sad

When we got word not long ago that a new Ghostface Killah record was coming, we got excited. This is the mad-genius rapper, after all, who gave us one of the last great New York hip-hop records (2000’s Supreme Clientele), plus the brain-busting masterstroke of 2006’s Fishscale. 

The new record is apparently called The Wizard of Poetry, a title that (while true) lacks a certain poetic ring. But then again, who else could spit lines like this tongue twister from Fishscale’s lead track, “Shakey Dog”?

“She work for Kevin, she ’bout 77 / She paid the dudes when she smoked his brother-in-law at his boss’ wedding. / Flew to Venezuela quickly when the big feds stepped in.”

Only Ghost would even try. So when we popped in a five-song sampler from the new album, we were hopeful. And now, we are depressed.

If these five songs are any indication, Wizard will be a third-rate R&B album sprinkled with forgettable rapping. Artistic growth is fine (hey, Kanye’s R&B excursion turned out great), but the five Wizard songs I’ve heard lack the spark, energy and wild artistic inspiration that has made Ghostface such a singular MC.

Here’s a track-by-track examination of the carnage…

1. “Baby” feat. Raheem “Radio” DeVaughn: The song opens with the sound of rolling dice—promising! Then a piano strikes up—uh-oh. The song turns out to be the sort of mediocre, jazz-inflected, finger-snapping drivel you’d expect in a mid-priced hotel lounge.

2. “He’s A Goner (I Got Ya)” feat. Lloyd: On my sampler, this song is just a 2:18 snippet, which is plenty. Lloyd is a third-rate Michael Jackson, and the song’s lyrics involve menstruation. The highlight is when Ghost rhymes “rosé” with “nosy.”

3. “Let’s Stop Playin’” feat. John Legend: Another snippet that's plenty long! This time Ghostface tells us a story about quasi-stalking his hottie neighbor. The drums sound like something from a Kenny Loggins record. As the song fades out, Ghost dreams he sees his girl at the laundromat.

4. “Forever”: In this mildly endearing song, the best of this batch, Ghostface compares his ladyfriend to a Zales diamond, and then tells her that he’ll never make her lose her gut. (He likes her “stretch-mark fat.”) We also learn that Ghost wears paisley pajamas that he bought in St. Thomas. Good to know.

5. "Computer Love": Almost comically bad, this song seems to have been produced by an 11-year-old Todd Rundgren. For a tune called “Computer Love,” the technology sounds woefully out of date—the vocals less like they were corrected in Auto-Tune and more like they were sung through Peter Frampton’s vocoder. The song at one point makes a joke about "Martin Luther Bling." I have a dream that one day Ghostface will release another album as good as Fishscale, instead of junk like this.

Wizard of Poetry is due out Sept. 29. Pray that it gets pushed back.