Comedy

"Texts From a Beta" Turns Raunchy Sexts Into The Best NSFW Song You'll Hear All Day

Comedy Video
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Warning: very NSFW lyrics in the above video.

What do you do if you’re a college-aged girl with a stunning singing voice and some frat guy has been sending you hilarious but absolutely disgusting text messages? You get your musician friends together and you literally turn his words into a damn catchy song. The result: “Texts From A Beta,” coming to a viral video store near you.

The lyrics, according to the video, are entirely composed of the gross text messages—which, by the way, the description mentions were consensual, so use caution before jumping down the guy’s throat or extrapolating too much about fraternity culture. The real humor here comes from the sincere delivery of some of the more graphic sexual descriptions you can think of. It looks like about 20 singers and instrumentalists were mobilized to make the song, and they’re all very talented, and they’re all singing and playing their hearts out as if these words are their holy bible. They’re probably also smart to have hidden their faces.

And the texts themselves—which, I reiterate, are really, truly raunchy—I mean, the guy behind them has some imagination. “I need you to greet me with your mouth wide open,” the song begins … and my journalistic integrity won’t let me write the rest. Just watch and listen.

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