Your Minute-By-Minute Olympic Viewing Guide: Tuesday Edition
Photo by Adam Pretty/Getty Olympics Features the olympics
There’s no time to waste! If you’re new to the guides, here’s what we’re all about:
1. Using both NBC’s various TV channels and their excellent live streaming site, I will show you how to watch the Olympics with an unmatched level of obsession and fanaticism. Note that every event listed on a TV network can also be streamed live, though the opposite is not true.
2. My focus is on catching every event where a medal is at stake, regardless of sport, and every team sport match featuring America. Follow me, and you’ll miss nothing.
3. Everything you see below is LIVE. We may be many things, but we are not tape-delay punks.
For a handy one-stop schedule of each event for the full two weeks, I made this spreadsheet to aid in your quest. Refer to it as needed.
On to a jam-packed day four …
Tuesday
9:00 a.m. — Equestrian — Team Eventing Finals — USA
Horses! I can honestly say that this is the one Olympic sport I have never watched at length, so with nothing else on this early, why not? I’ll report back later in the week.
10:00 a.m. — Tennis — Early Rounds — Computer
Still early days here, but good for the background.
10:00 a.m. — Men’s Beach Volleyball — Dalhausser/Lucena vs. Mexico — NBC
A win here, and Lucena/Dalhausser are almost certainly through to the knockout rounds.
10:40 a.m. — Women’s Water Polo — U.S. vs. Spain — NBC
The men have suffered two brutal losses, including one yesterday to Spain that would have been a win if not for a slew of terrible mental errors. This is the first match for the American women, and they’re defending gold at the 2012 Games.
12:00 p.m. — Swimming — Qualifying Heats — Computer
The men’s 100 freestyle opening heats, among others.
12:00 p.m. — Men’s Rugby Sevens — U.S. vs. Argentina — NBCSN
After an incredibly successful women’s event, there’s a ton of momentum heading into the men’s side. This is the first of two matches on the day for the U.S., and both are pretty winnable. In other words, no Australia/New Zealand/Fiji quite yet.
1:00 p.m. — Equestrian — Individual Eventing Finals — USA
One horsey event per day is plenty for me, but if you watch in the morning and decide you haven’t had enough, there’s a free hour here. Also, you might be a centaur.
2:00 p.m. — Men’s Volleyball — U.S. vs. Italy — NBC
After a brutal loss to Canada on Sunday, this is close to a must-win. Unfortunately, Italy is really solid.
2:16 p.m. — Canoe — Men’s Singles Whitewater — Computer
This is wayyyy more fun than it sounds. There are only four whitewater events in the Olympics, so make sure you catch at least one of them. It always seems like such an arduous sport, and to win, you have to avoid penalties and be super fast through the turns.
2:30 p.m. — Weightlifting — Women’s 63kg Finals — Computer
Are there any hardcore weightlifting fans in the world who aren’t themselves weightlifters?
3:00 p.m. — Diving — Women’s Synchronized 10m Platform Finals — Computer
If China lost, it would be the biggest upset in sports history.
3:00 p.m. — Gymnastics — Women’s Team Final — Computer
Yesterday, I gave you permission to hold off on watching men’s gymnastics live if you wanted to experience it in prime time, and then NBC didn’t show it until like 11:30. They’ll probably do better with women’s since Simone Biles is a phenomenon and the U.S. should win gold, but I’m not taking any chances. This is what I get for tacitly accepting tape-delay viewing…from now on, it’s live or bust.
3:00 p.m. — Shooting — Women’s 25m pistol — Computer
I wish the 25 meters referred to the length of the pistol.
3:30 p.m. — Women’s Beach Volleyball — Fendrick/Sweat vs. Brazil — NBC
Fendrick and Sweat lost their first match already, and this one will mostly be interesting to see Brazil, who will be one of the main obstacles in the way of Walsh-Jennings and Ross come the knockout stages. But an American upset isn’t impossible—they really need to win this one.
3:30 p.m. — Judo — Women’s 63kg Finals — Computer
Maybe this will be the day I watch a Judo match. Probably not, but maybe.
4:15 p.m. — Fencing — Men’s Epee Medal Matches — Computer
I watched the women’s epee yesterday, and it was so confusing. For the most part, both players hit each other at the same time, both cheer as though they just won the point, and then the referee decides who gets the point based on his mood, or something. I like fencing, but consider me a foil/sabre man.
4:20 p.m. — Judo — Men’s 81kg Finals — Computer
This is what a Judo score looks like:
What the hell does any of that mean? How did one guy get 111 points? Is it a point per hit? Because if that’s the case, the other guy must be dead. And what does “0s1” mean? Judo, why do you make it so hard to love you?
5:00 p.m. — Men’s Rugby Sevens — U.S. vs. Brazil — CNBC
All about it, baby. This seems like a match we could win, since I’d have to guess Brazil only got into the tournament by virtue of being the host country. They can’t be any good at rugby, right? This is a soccer nation!
6:00 p.m. — Women’s Soccer — U.S. vs. Colombia — NBCSN
After the win against France, the Americans should coast into the knockout round. This one should be relatively drama-free.
6:00 p.m. — Weightlifting — Men’s 69kg Finals — Computer
I’ve already watched my one weightlifting event for these Olympics, and it’s hard to imagine putting the time in for a second. But it’s here if you want it!
9:19 p.m. — Swimming — Women’s 200m Freestyle Finals — NBC
Ledecky will have her hands full with Sarah Sjoldstrom, who I have taken to calling “The Swedish Fish.” It will be fun to see, because I’m pretty sure Ledecky could have survived a shark attack and still won her 400 free race. I love American gold, but I don’t love blowouts, and this one should deliver the goods.
9:28 p.m — Swimming — Men’s 200m Butterfly Finals — NBC
Every single night, something happens in the semifinal heats that sets the table beautifully and dramatically for the next night’s finals. Last night was no exception:
This is not a path I would go down. pic.twitter.com/82BAaCY3cx
— Kyle Porter (@KylePorterCBS) August 9, 2016
What the hell was LeClos thinking? You do not wake the monster! I am praying for a total Phelps beatdown tomorrow.
10:29 p.m. — Swimming — Women’s 200 IM Finals — NBC
This is another one of those events where that Hungarian swimmer will dominate, and we’ll see a million shots of her crazy muscle-bound husband/coach going nuts on the sidelines while the announcers tiptoe around the fact that A, she’s probably doping, and B, he’s probably emotionally abusive. Always a blast.
10:38 p.m. — Swimming — Men’s 4×200 Free Relay Finals — NBC
It’s not 4×100, but a relay is a relay, and this is another great finish to the night. Unlike the 4×100, which the U.S. won despite not being favored, the Americans are odds-on favorites over Australia and France here.
10:45 p.m. — Sleep well, fanatics. Set the alarm for 8:45 a.m., and look out for Wednesday’s guide.