James Comey’s Congressional hearing was like watching the classmate you hate bomb a class presentation. It’s pretty funny at first, but then it’s just sad and you want it to be over. If you watched all three hours of Comey’s hearing, something you probably want to do is watch more videos about the hearing. We got you covered with all of the late-night hosts’ takes on the testimony, which we’ve compiled here for your viewing pleasure.
Late Night with Seth Meyers made light of the fact that Trump’s allies are defending him by reminding people that he is an “outsider president” who has no idea how the law or government work, and could have an outburst at any time. They might as well admit that Trump finger-paints on the Oval Office floor while Mike Pence pulls all the strings and Steve Bannon handcuffs himself to a desk so he can make decisions without the devil pulling him straight down to hell. “It’s a sad state of affairs when the White House has to handle the President like a toddler on a road trip,” says Meyers, “Okay, I got the iPad and the sticker book, Ziploc full of cheerios, three binkies … I think we’re good. Let’s roll.” Watch the full segment above.
Trevor Noah took a different approach with an According to Jim spoof—a show that would have almost been more comfortable to watch than the three-hour hearing. Noah took shots at the superficiality of the testimony, with every juicy question being ignored and stockpiled for a “private session” to be held at a later date: “I mean today’s hearing was cool and everything, but basically it was like listening to a clean version of a hip-hop song,” Noah quipped.
Jimmy Fallon pieced together clips from the hearing with clips from soap operas and also brought up Comey’s cancellation of dinner with his wife in order to have dinner with Trump: “Comey tried to take his wife out the next night, and she said, ‘Actually, Trump just asked me to dinner.’”
Stephen Colbert office celebrated “St. Comey’s Day” with a joke-writing binge. Colbert touched on Comey’s secret Trump diary, in which he kept a detailed account of his meetings with the President because he thought he “might lie.” “He thought Trump might lie? That’s razor-sharp FBI instinct in action right there,” jokes Colbert. In a shocking development, Comey revealed that he asked “a friend” of his to share a copy of the “memos” he wrote with a reporter. Hopefully the New York Star will release Comey’s diary a page a week in their “Scandals in the White House” column so we can learn more about Comey and Trump’s steamy candlelit dinner.
We hope you’ve enjoyed these clips of comedians making light of the terrifying reality we live in. You can watch a withheld portion of the hearing’s broadcast that we covertly obtained here. Now go take a nap or go for a hike and try to forget, at least for a few minutes, that doom is inevitable. And will somebody please make sure John McCain is okay?