Politics

Cool Republican Dude Stephen Miller Once Crashed a Girls' Track Meet to Prove That Men Are Superior to Women

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Cool Republican Dude Stephen Miller Once Crashed a Girls' Track Meet to Prove That Men Are Superior to Women

We could spend a lot of time dissecting all the different ways that 32-year-old senior White House policy advisor Stephen Miller sucks, and this handy profile by the New York Times is a great reference work. The material from his childhood is rich enough on its own—his campaign against school janitors, the way he dumped a friend because he had acne and was Latino, or the time he wrote an editorial noting that there were no Hispanic students in his honor classes. And then there’s all the anti-immigration stuff, which has spanned the rich, troll-ish expanse of his entire life.

But let’s cut right to the chase—no pun intended—and recount an anecdote that perfectly demonstrates the type of human we’re dealing with here. It gets just two short lines in the Times story, but it says so very much:

He jumped, uninvited, into the final stretch of a girls’ track meet, apparently intent on proving his athletic supremacy over the opposite sex. (The White House, reaching for exculpatory context, noted that this was a girls’ team from another school, not his own.)

Uhhh…

God.

God, this guy sucks.

I mean…this guy really, really sucks.

That story has it all—his abhorrent beliefs, his taste for spectacle, and his ability to piss people off while shamelessly making an ass of himself. So the next time you see Stephen Miller at the mic, or standing behind Trump as the president spouts off anti-immigrant talking points, just imagine him jumping onto that track, chasing down a group of high school girls—totally convinced he’s making a great and righteous and necessary point.

And then remember that he’s one of the most powerful people in the executive branch.

DRINK.

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