Mark Zuckerberg, the overgrown My Buddy doll who built Facebook, unveiled his latest operating system update live on Capitol Hill today during a Congressional hearing into Facebook’s data scandal. It’s must-see TV if you’re a big fan of second-hand embarrassment, whether it’s for thirtysomething tech dorks with no social skills or eightysomething politicians with no tech skills. Basically a large group of old white men are grilling a much younger white man (or man-shaped walking algorithm) about something they know absolutely nothing about. If you get nervous watching people who don’t speak the same language try to communicate with each other, you’ll probably shake in discomfort over this hearing—even though everybody involved is speaking English, absolutely nobody involved can understand each other.
Given that the tech industry might be the only thing less popular with most Americans than politicians, and given that Zuckerberg holds a special place of contempt within that overreaching tech hatred, clearly this DC sideshow would provide some great grist for the endless Twitter mill. There are two perfect targets in a single story, letting every would-be jokesmith feel confident enough to tweet out every comment that enters their head. Some of them area actually funny, though, including this clutch of cutting remarks below. Check ‘em out and yes, please share on Facebook as soon as you can. (We might not like the rules of media today, but we still have to live by ‘em.)