Last Week Tonight is still on vacation for a few more weeks, but John Oliver has made sure that he creates enough content to keep his viewers satisfied. This week, his topic of choice is none other than birds. That’s right, those small winged creatures you see in your backyard, the ones that helped Snow White clean up the dwarf’s cottage. John Oliver really hates those things.
Things start out on a fairly even keel, with Oliver discussing the fact that the cold temperatures are going to force migratory birds to fly south for the winter. From there, things get a bit more heated. As Oliver tears the birds down one by one, it becomes clear that these are deep-seated feelings.
“Yes, I’m talking to you, geese,” the host exclaims. “You look like ducks that played football in high school and never stopped going to the gym.” Oliver doesn’t feel much better about parrots, attacking the idea that he should like them just because they talk. “Basically every human being talks, and I hate most of them,” said Oliver.
Of course, the real issue here is that Oliver is jealous of his skyward neighbors. “I hope all of you disgusting sky mice enjoy your tropical getaways,” cried Oliver, “while the rest of us face the frigid torment of winter.” Watch the full clip above to get a sense of just how angry Oliver gets about birds, and find out exactly how he feels about ostriches (hint: it’s not great).