Canadian Police Will Punish Drunk Drivers with Nickelback This Holiday Season

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For all its joy, peace and love, the holiday season has its dark sides. For example, between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day, there is a sharp increase in drunk driving. The police officers in Kensington, Canada, are aware of this trend, and have announced that they will be playing Nickelback’s 2001 release Silver Side Up while exercising the full extent of the law on drunk drivers.

Kensington’s police posted on Facebook last Saturday with the threat and a picture of an unopened copy of the album on cassette. The message reads, “When we catch you, and we will catch you, on top of a hefty fine, a criminal charge and a years driving suspension we will also provide you with a bonus gift of playing the office’s copy of Nickelback in the cruiser on the way to jail.” The officers clearly don’t relish the idea of having to bust out the Nickelback tape, saying, “Let’s not ruin a perfectly good unopened copy of Nickelback.”

It’s a funny little post, but it also brings up so many questions like: Why does the office have a copy of Nickelback’s Silver Side Up lying around in the first place? Why is it a cassette? Do their police cars still have cassette players? Who felt the need to buy the cassette, but then couldn’t be bothered to even open it? Is Canada actually stuck 15 pop-culture years in the past and just now going through their Nickelback phase? Do these police realize Silver Side Up is the closest that Nickelback has ever come to making a good album? And shouldn’t they abstain from dogpiling on the much-maligned musicians, who are also Canadian, if only out of patriotism?

Also, this goes without saying, but don’t drink and drive, dummies.

You can see the Kensington police’s Facebook post recreated below. Find the post itself here.

Kensington Police Drinking and Driving Gift. Christmas Bonus Edition

So, the Holiday Season is upon us and that means more social events, staff parties and alcohol based libations. Now, Because of that fact, it logically means more people need to plan their nights driving duties. To save any problems at the end of the night, know ahead of time who is the Designated Driver. Write down the number to a cab company or plan to stay over at friends. Anything and everything you can do to eliminate the chances of drinking and driving.

Now, with that being said, know that the Kensington Police Service will be out for the remainder of year looking for those dumb enough to feel they can drink and drive. And when we catch you, and we will catch you, on top of a hefty fine, a criminal charge and a years driving suspension we will also provide you with a bonus gift of playing the offices copy of Nickelback in the cruiser on the way to jail.

Now, now, no need to thank us, we figure if you are foolish enough to get behind the wheel after drinking then a little Chad Kroeger and the boys is the perfect gift for you.

So please, lets not ruin a perfectly good unopened copy of Nickelback. You don’t drink and drive and we won’t make you listen to it.

Happy Saturday Everyone!!

Canada Cops Nickelback Cassette.jpg

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