Feminism Expert Carly Fiorina Thinks the Suffragettes Wouldn’t Have Liked Hillary

Noted feminist scholar Carly Fiorina, who somehow managed to run an unsuccessful presidential and vice presidential campaign before primary season was even over, has set her sights on Hillary Clinton. And the result isn’t pretty: After looking into her heart of hearts and channeling the spirit of Susan B. Anthony, Fiorina has determined that the suffragettes who fought for the right to vote in America wouldn’t think much of the Democratic nominee.

“So many of those suffragettes would have disagreed strenuously with Hillary Clinton, but they also would have defended her right to disagree with them,” Fiorina said in a D.C. speech to the Faith & Freedom Coalition’s Road to the Majority (brevity is not the soul of conservatism, apparently), referencing Clinton’s victory video after her primary wins on Tuesday. “I bring this up because unfortunately feminism is no longer a term that’s used to enable or empower women.”

“Let me say to every woman and girl out there: don’t let anyone tell you what to think,” Fiorina continued. “Mrs. Clinton, newsflash: I’m a feminist and I’m not voting for you.”

Those were not Fiorina’s only opinions. She had this to say about the burgeoning progressive movement in America:

“Progressivism, pure and simple, is the tyranny of the few over the many. It is what our founders feared most. It is one of the reasons why they wrote the Constitution — to prevent the concentration of power…when we think about those proud progressives locked arm-in-arm speaking to Americans all across the nation, we know this fight matters. This is a fight that we must win.”

And here’s what she claims to have told Rosie Perez, co-host of The View, about why she’s a conservative:

“Rosie, I’m a conservative because I know every single one of us is gifted by God. All of us have the capacity to live lives of dignity and purpose and meaning. And all throughout time, work, if done well, brings us dignity. Family brings us purpose and faith brings meaning to our lives.

“And I know that our values, our policies, our principals work better to lift everyone up regardless of their circumstances. This, Rosie, is not what progressives believe.

“Progressives believe some are smarter than others, some are better than others. So some are doing to decide for others and choose for others. This is not what this nation can stand for — that’s why I’m a conservative.”

No word yet on why Fiorina is thrusting herself back into the public sphere. Maybe she’s campaigning for the VP spot on Trump’s ticket. If so, we can only guess that it will turn out like everything else she’s tried thus far in life, from Hewlett-Packard to the 2016 election: A total failure.