21 Striking Similarities Between Game of Thrones and the 2016 Election Cycle

The Internet is teeming with Game of Thrones conspiracy theories, but here’s one that’s absolutely true: George R.R. Martin basically wrote the 2016 American election cycle before it ever happened. These 21 parallels are more than just coincidence—they’re ironclad proof that, like Bran Stark, Martin can travel through time and access knowledge denied to the rest of us. Get ready for a mind explosion.

(Note: There are spoilers below—both for Game of Thrones and the 2016 election cycle—for those who aren’t caught up.)

The evidence:

1. At the beginning, there are way too many wannabe kings, most of whom are buffoons or zealots that get knocked off very quickly.

2. A single-issue candidate from the snowy north, radicalized in his youth and beloved by the people, sacrifices himself for a greater cause.

3. There’s a dude with Little Fingers, and all the sudden he has way too much power.

Somebody please end this madness.

4. A philandering ruler humiliates his wife over and over with affairs, but she stays with him for mainly political reasons, and aside from the endless shame, it’s working out okay.

Bill, listen: If Hillary suggests that you take some time off and go on a wild boar hunt, don’t do it!

5. One of the main characters has the power to assume new identities at will.

6. So much of the action revolves around a fucking wall.

I heard Bran the Builder made the wildlings pay for it.

7. There’s a universally despised character with weird hair who everyone hates, including his/her so-called allies, but has a lot of secondary influence because of his/her position, and conspires to kill a main character.

Walder Frey, meet Debbie Wasserman Schultz.

8. Just because you’re named Hand of the King doesn’t mean you’ll be around very long.

9. It’s looking more and like a guy with a really frightening smile who has a history of stabbing people and is a “surgeon,” of sorts, is the only one who can disrupt the White Walkers.

Ramsay the Flayer + this guy:

10. Bald old socialist with messy hair rises against powerful rich blond woman who represents the establishment.

11. A promise of total revolution gets rapidly transformed into “incremental progress” in order to placate the rich.

Tyrion: Hey, um, all you freed slaves of Essos? About that…you guys can do seven more years, right?

12. Everyone has forgotten about a character who endures a rough beginning and drops out early, but it’s going to be a living nightmare for a lot of people when they come back.

I promise you this: As much as you hate me right now for comparing Arya Stark to Scott Walker, I hate myself even more.

13. The youngest male in a famous family whose father was ruler and whose older brother was also very powerful has ambitions to rule himself, but is weak and ineffectual and ultimately pretty pathetic, and gets constantly gets humiliated by a bigger, stronger man until the whole thing ends in the most painful way possible.

14. There’s a terrifying army of Whites who have evolved from much gentler, nobler origins.

Did you know the noble Children of the Forest created the White Walkers to try to save their race? Did you know the Republican party was responsible for Abraham Lincoln? Oh how far we’ve fallen!

15. We know we’re supposed to care about the Green Party, and they seem to have a lot of great ideas, but there’s just no way they’ll ever be powerful enough to have a real impact.

Sorry, Children of the Forest. (Oh wait, you created the White Walkers. Fuck you!) (Wait, does this mean Jill Stein created Donald Trump?!)

16. A mentally deranged character has a very creepy relationship with a child.

Whenever you read a new story about Trump’s strange, disturbing comments about his daughters, I want you to think of this:

17. A master of intrigue and manipulation switches sides dramatically to back a female leader from the complete opposite end of the spectrum, yet still has no ethical boundaries.

Lord Varys is David Brock, who spent his past life as a Republican henchman—he was responsible for discrediting Anita Hill during the Clarence Thomas trial—before jumping ship and becoming the head of Hillary Clinton’s super PAC, where he now spends most of his time leading a troll army to defame Bernie Sanders.

18. There’s a sadist who likes to torture and murder people in gruesome ways, and whose father assassinated a charismatic young leader.

Don’t even need to explain this one—Ramsay Bolton is a sicko whose dad Roose stabbed Robb Stark, and it’s accepted as fact that Ted Cruz is the zodiac killer, and that his dad killed JFK.

19. There’s a female candidate willing to burn everything to the ground to fulfill her destiny.

20. The richest people in the world are used to controlling the entire political scene, but now find that all their gold amounts to very little in the face of an unpredictable outsider supported by fanatics.

House Koch and House Lannister could both use a drink.

21. “The Kingsmoot was basically an election where the establishment powers tried to install the land’s first female ruler until an arrogant, misogynistic oaf bragging about his penis suddenly got all the attention and somehow won. Sure dragons, zombies and time-travel I get. But this just seems a little far-fetched.”

Credit to Josh Jackson for that paragraph from our review on Monday. Although I have no idea what he could possibly be referring to.