The Funniest Tweets About the Silicon Valley Douches Who Invented a Gentrification Vending Machine

If you haven’t read the story about the so-called Bodega Box, go here and languish in the horror. The gist is that two Silicon Valley bros have invented something that is definitely-not-a-vending-machine, and in true tech bro fashion, are gleefully marketing it as the thing that will make mom-and-pop bodegas obsolete.

Luckily, Twitter was on hand to demolish them for the incompetent, soulless capitalists that they are. Here are the best tweets about the Bodega Box…you might notice some repetition.

SV managed to invent a culturally insensitive vending machine https://t.co/DWnFjPJIVP pic.twitter.com/IYQe9AX6yJ
— Shane (@shaneferro) September 13, 2017

A vending machine. You’re describing a vending machine. https://t.co/Ace0mJ8HRg pic.twitter.com/aW6ryUFifn
— Jack Smith IV (@JackSmithIV) September 13, 2017

a bad way to publicize your vending-machine startup is to say it’s going to kill NYC’s last beloved institution https://t.co/XipTYL8Tzk
— Max Read (@max_read) September 13, 2017
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check out my new business, bodega. gestures at shoebox in hallway filled with loose cigarettes and hot cheetos
— Max Read (@max_read) September 13, 2017

This is a goddamn vending machine. pic.twitter.com/IquQZOskkv
— Erik Hinton (@erikhinton) September 13, 2017

You not getting one magnum, a chopped cheese sangwich and a Dutch from a bodega box foh b
— Desus Nice (@desusnice) September 13, 2017

Walks into bodega
Me: “Let me get a chopped cheese with grilled onion.”
Bodega: pic.twitter.com/ftAzfSjSYl
— Clumsy King ???????? (@CushKobain) September 13, 2017

the bodega box is fine bc people will immediately start leaving garbage in them & no one is gonna want to rummage through trash for tampons
— Ashley Feinberg (@ashleyfeinberg) September 13, 2017

Ooh this is fun, can I try? “Two ex-LinkedIners want to make family dinners and picnics obsolete.”
— Will Oremus (@WillOremus) September 13, 2017

Anyone who can go in a bodega and decide it needs to be made sterile and personality-free doesn’t need to have money or influence
— Amanda Mull (@amandamull) September 13, 2017

These stupid motherfuckers literally invented a vending machine. https://t.co/Hu1zwsXTpJ
— jay????????????kang (@jaycaspiankang) September 13, 2017

if you replace my bodega with a fucking box i will launch you into the sun
— leon ???? (@leyawn) September 13, 2017

lmao this person thinks bodega cats are just a meme pic.twitter.com/ZXFs9FDyO2
— Candace Bryan (@cantdancebryan) September 13, 2017

Weird that they’re calling this heinous vending machine “Bodega” and not “Gentrification Box” https://t.co/xPCozclRRD
— Tristan Cooper (@TristanACooper) September 13, 2017

a vending machine is not a bodega
— Greg Howard (@greghoward88) September 13, 2017

A vending machine at the gym is going to get me an egg sandwich and a coffee while catching me up on its family’s struggles in Yemen? https://t.co/R57Qfbl2JV
— Helter Seltzer (@Matt_Hecht) September 13, 2017

Wealthy tech bros are so uncomfortable interacting w working class POC that they think a glorified vending machine is better than a bodega. https://t.co/wPWhfkwBrx
— vero bayetti flores (@veroconplatanos) September 13, 2017

1. “Ooh let’s kill small, local businesses!”
2. This is a vending machine you numbnuts.
3. Jucerio. https://t.co/qlFIR9hoWN
— Maureen Johnson (@maureenjohnson) September 13, 2017

Congrats to Silicon Valley for reinventing the vending machine. pic.twitter.com/5zdlASZjpM
— Chris Person (@Papapishu) September 13, 2017

“How can we make a vending machine worse and more sinister?” is classic Silicon Valley
— Connor Wroe Southard (@ConnorSouthard) September 13, 2017

99% of Silicon Valley is morons giving other morons money for inventing a thing that already exists. https://t.co/cSXQWYEoCr
— Pixelated Boat (@pixelatedboat) September 13, 2017

Please call your Senators and tell them a luxury vending machine cannot and will not make you a perfect sloppy egg and cheese at 2AM.
— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) September 13, 2017

“What if we made a vending machine, but we made it harder to use and we also put small minority business owners out of business?”
“Sold!”
— Senator Wario (@senatorwario) September 13, 2017

Dear Bodega Cats,
Now’s the time to start the revolution.
— Morgan Jerkins (@MorganJerkins) September 13, 2017

Ivy Leaguers use education to invent cabinet…
— Daniel Edelman (@d_edelman) September 13, 2017

And, to get past the humor for a second, here’s what it all boils down to:

A vending machine isn’t part of the community. People running our corner markets are.
— Eva Destruction (@EvaDestrction) September 13, 2017

anyway, if a store on the corner isn’t convenient enough for you, it ain’t convenience keeping you out of the bodega. it’s the people.
— El Flaco (@bomani_jones) September 13, 2017

it’s blatant. they want the convenience of the bodega without having to interact with the people whose neighborhood they invaded.
— king crissle (@crissles) September 13, 2017

The Bodega startup makes me think of what Edward Luttwak told @CoreyRobin almost two decades ago. (I think about this quote every day, tbh.) pic.twitter.com/OeRKlFuyKS
— Jonathan Shainin (@jonathanshainin) September 13, 2017

‘Real bodegas are all about human relationships within a community’ just because we can disrupt an entire sector…should we?
— jaminbrazil (@jaminbrazil) September 13, 2017