Thanksgiving, as Told by Wednesday Addams

I watched Addams Family Values for the first time when I was 11 years old. I don’t think I’d seen the first movie, or even knew that it existed. That year, I dressed up as Wednesday Addams in the Thanksgiving scene for Halloween. My four best friends were all blonde and I hadn’t even noticed. When people made comments about what a sweet Pocahontas I was—people were less political then—I told them, “No, I’m not Pocahontas. I’m Wednesday as Pocahontas.” I wanted to be her in that scene, the one where she stops everything and tells everyone how the Thanksgiving story really goes. The one where she sets everything on fire.
In Addams Family Values, the second and unanimously the best Addams Family movie, Wednesday Addams and her brother Pugsley get sent to summer camp. At summer camp, everyone is blonde. They cheer a lot at summer camp, and clap like little girls, and make the Addams siblings watch Disney movies when they act sour or don’t smile enough.
“Welcome to America’s foremost facility for privileged young adults! We’re all here to learn, to grow, and to just plain have fun. ‘Cause that’s what being privileged is all about!”
It’s all sarcasm, but it’s delivered so genuinely a child could never pick up the undertones. With screenwriter Paul Rudnick’s subtle adult humor and snarky references, there’s a lot more going on at summer camp than overly spunky white kids in matching khaki uniforms.
For one, lead camp counselors Gary Granger and Becky Martin-Granger can be easily associated with a lot of “ist” words—elitist, racist, classist. They even disapprove of the kid with headgear. But I didn’t like the scene because Wednesday was setting the record straight, or revealing the unspoken truth about the politically problematic origins of Thanksgiving. I liked the scene because Amanda Buckman was a huge bitch, and in that Thanksgiving play Wednesday executed the sweetest, renegade revenge I’d ever seen. I was Wednesday, and Wednesday was a badass.
“You know what we’re gonna do with them. We’re gonna show that anyone—no matter how odd, or pale or chubby, can still have a darn good time!”
Gary and Becky Granger send Wednesday, Pugsley and their outcast friend Joel to the harmony tent to watch a marathon of cheerful, princess-inspired movies like The Little Mermaid. Afterwards, they convince everyone at camp that they’re “fixed.” Wednesday even sort-of smiles. It’s decided Wednesday will play Pocahontas, and Pugsley will play the turkey in the end-of-summer Thanksgiving Day play. I never once questioned why Camp Chippewa had decided to reenact the Thanksgiving story during summer. It didn’t matter. This was best scene, the triumphant moment.
“Why, you are as civilized as we. Except we wear shoes and have last names. Welcome to our table, our new primitive friends.”
Wednesday hates the world because she doesn’t fit in it, but her ultimate nemesis is the evil and milky little miss Amanda Buckman. We hate Amanda from the moment she smiles. She represents the girls in high school who acted nice, but weren’t, the girls we imagined brushed their hair one thousand times through every night. For the Thanksgivings Day play, Amanda gets the part of Sarah Miller, queen pilgrim. Sarah invites Pocahontas and her friends to dinner, and in her overdone nice-girl pilgrim act, she uses the word “savage” twice.