The Best Tweets of the Week
One of those guys above has to be Hamilton. Right? I feel like all those dudes ran together back in the day, so if you see that many in a room together they pretty much all have to be there. Even Button Gwinnett, namesake of the dead mall outside Atlanta where they shot Stranger Things and also found a weeks-old corpse in the food court a few years ago. Doing Button proud all these years later.
Hamilton hitting Disney+ was the pop culture story of the week, but in the realm of things that actually matter, it was another barnburner of a week. The coronavirus continues to rage through America, our president continues to politicize and downplay it, and businesses continue to reopen despite the danger—including, somehow, Disney World. Meanwhile Ghislaine Maxwell is still in custody and shockingly still alive. It was a busy week, and it had some tweets in it. Check ‘em out below and make sure to follow every single one of these accounts on the Twitter app.
Alan Dershowitz’s defense of sex creeps is so old Alan Dershowitz wouldn’t fuck it
— Erin boat parade Ryan (@morninggloria) July 3, 2020
Finally watching Hamilton. This is what everyone was so excited about??? pic.twitter.com/7HEoHyx3cu
— pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat) July 4, 2020
The most terrifying half-tomato I’ve ever had. pic.twitter.com/fhoOqPO3Gh
— Matt Welch (@MattWelch) July 3, 2020
every day I thank god that Glee ended before Hamilton came out
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) July 3, 2020
Checked the maple syrup we use to make sure there wasn’t racist imagery on it and I am pleased to announce it is just a bunch of folks inexplicably saying hello to a horse. pic.twitter.com/lN3yYsF3pa
— Jennifer Wright (@JenAshleyWright) June 30, 2020
Watching a movie about nuclear war to relax
— donni saphire (@donni) July 5, 2020
Holt shit, I gotta hand it to her, Elon’s mom really embraced the villainess aesthetic. This is exact what an apartheid emerald heiress would look like in a comic book. pic.twitter.com/efE5gZxzYd
— ian miles chode (@danker_hank) July 5, 2020
kinda obsessed with how instagram lesbian influencers now look like sweet valley high villain covergirls pic.twitter.com/4sw1q3EeOb
— porochista khakpour (@PKhakpour) July 5, 2020
holy shit the simpsons really did predict everything. this is from January, 1994 pic.twitter.com/6fSEr4Jpi0
— Jeremy Kaplowitz (@jeremysmiles) July 5, 2020
when the book club finishes white fragility pic.twitter.com/7L7PC6F6MG
— jordan (@JordanUhl) July 5, 2020
charlie daniels died doing what he loved…tweeting about benghazi every single day on his ipad
— cinnamon bun (@notsofiacoppola) July 6, 2020
if I die after I pay my rent, sit me on the couch till da 30th
— c mo (@Cxlby_) July 6, 2020
it’s a good thing these kids missed their prom and graduation so this maskless school cop could bring coronavirus directly to their doorstep https://t.co/Rlvxn4tZZa
— Matt Binder (@MattBinder) July 7, 2020
I, too, have written an open letter. pic.twitter.com/GVm8Bppjxz
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) July 7, 2020
The oldest age you can possibly be is 32 but from the perspective of a 23 yr old. Does this make sense?
— Rachel Wenitsky (@RachelWenitsky) July 7, 2020
Never got far enough in Ninja Gaiden arcade to see the Ninja give props to some window cleaners. Ninja Gaiden : friend to the working man pic.twitter.com/VWHU4Z68uS
— RustyShacklesArt (@rusty_shackles) July 7, 2020
When people ask me what Twitter is like I show them this pic.twitter.com/WOUHQwGXdK
— Jay Phelps (@_jayphelps) July 7, 2020
ok just getting ahead of this:
i signed an open letter about pineapple belonging on pizza, but they didn’t tell me i’d be cosigning with literally just the golden state killer. i do agree with the spirit of the letter but not his statement that “it pairs well with family murder”
— Sam Haft (@SamHaft) July 8, 2020
excuse me sir do you have a moment to talk about living deliciously pic.twitter.com/z5zyPpXzLr
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) July 9, 2020
Imagine if Donald Trump had gotten his wish to own a TV channel and Mark Zuckerberg had gotten his wish to meet girls.
— Anand Giridharadas (@AnandWrites) July 9, 2020
sometimes Taco Bell will put a tortilla, meat, cheese, and rice in a new interesting order and you gotta go check that out and see what’s goin on
— Casey Anthony Funko Pop (@JuliusIrvington) July 9, 2020
comedy is all about getting laughs and doing gamergates
— Face Value Seth (@sasimons) July 9, 2020
I read all of today’s articles and they’re not that interesting, you can skip them
— Tim Kalpakis (@TimKalpakis) July 10, 2020