The Funniest Tweets of the Week

let’s hope everyone, regardless of affiliation, has the integrity to congratulate gianforte on his win by shoving things in his face forever

— Slammin Bod Jeb Lund (@Mobute) May 26, 2017

The men upset about the women-only Wonder Woman screening are going to lose it when they find out where Wonder Woman is from.

— Jesse McLaren (@McJesse) May 26, 2017

well my friends are getting deported and I’m gonna lose my health coverage. Thanks for asking though! pic.twitter.com/mClcIUwAzi

— Kath Barbadoro (@kathbarbadoro) May 26, 2017

I CANT BELIEVE THIS JUST HAPPENED TO ME IM SCREAMING pic.twitter.com/TiDD8NoFi8

— Stephne Tate (@quailtea) May 26, 2017

Hey if Jared Kushner’s so stupid how’d he become senior advisor to one of the dumbest assholes who’s ever lived

— Nick Wiger (@nickwiger) May 27, 2017

JARED KUSHNER
JARDKSHNER
JRDKSHNR
JDKSHN
JDK
DK
D
DC
DOC
DOICRM
DOINGCR
DOINGCRMS
DOING CRIMES

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— Sal Paradeez(nuts) (@Karate_Horse) May 27, 2017

THINGS JARED KUSHNER COULD HAVE DONE AS A MILLIONAIRE:
beach, Nintendo switch, nice apartment, lots of Thai food

THING HE DID:
treason

— albro (@bromanconsul) May 27, 2017

new back channel who dis

— Naomi Irene Rohatyn (@omibaloney) May 27, 2017

Me: I have a boyfriend.
You: Oh yeah, what’s his name?
Me: … uh https://t.co/mKIRDJh5Lc

— Luke O’Neil (@lukeoneil47) May 27, 2017

Ernest Hemingway was once challenged to write the saddest story possible in 6 words. The result: pic.twitter.com/5DVQm7R7aY

— Jason O. Gilbert (@gilbertjasono) May 27, 2017

Kushner not going anywhere. He’s much too strong & masculine—also has a huge dick, way bigger than Bannon’s, extremely anonymous source says https://t.co/JTjR0nKxmH

— Ashley Feinberg (@ashleyfeinberg) May 27, 2017

fidget spinners are whack, when I was in 8th grade we’d shove a spoonful of cinnamon down our throats and try to survive for fun

— Daddy Mikey (@GG_Mikey) May 27, 2017

WOW Baby Sinclair From “Dinosaurs” Is The Original Millennial
disrespect to elders
doomed to die in climate catastrophe caused by elders

— Michæl Lu†z (@WarrenIsDead) May 26, 2017

THE MOST WOKE MAN IN AMERICA: A SCREENPLAY BY MITRA JOUHARI pic.twitter.com/4VVmUOoGbW

— Mitra Jouhari (@tweetrajouhari) May 26, 2017

THE MOST CHILLING TWO-MINUTE DOCUMENTARY ABOUT A SERIAL KILLER EVER! https://t.co/mCFvY3b9Zjpic.twitter.com/AM23G7ksIt

— Cole Escola (@ColeEscola) May 25, 2017