Superlatives are a peculiar component of middle-school and high-school yearbooks. Students cast ballots by writing the name of a student under categories like “most likely to be president,” “most likely to pull the ultimate prank” and “most likely to be late on graduation,” and then the results are published in the yearbook. At their worst, yearbook superlatives can become superficial popularity contests or at best, can become goofy school-wide inside jokes. Instead of reliving those awkward years of school, we decided to compile a music-inspired list of yearbook superlatives. We picked some standout albums from 2018 and assigned them a “most likely to” tag. From Mitski’s Be The Cowboy to Father John Misty’s God’s Favorite Customer, we reimagined these albums as school yearbook superlatives.
Most likely to be covered by a drunk lounge singer – Arctic Monkeys: Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino
Most likely to make you lose your body weight in tears – Boygenius: Boygenius EP
Most likely to accompany a badass desert car chase – Phantastic Ferniture: Phantastic Ferniture
Most likely to injure someone with a hug – Idles: Joy as an Act of Resistance
Most likely to make your Led Zeppelin-worshipping uncle wet himself with excitement – Greta Van Fleet: Anthem of the Peaceful Army
Most likely to destroy technology for performance art – Bodega: Endless Scroll
Most likely to cause a food fight at a music critic dinner – The 1975: A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships
Most likely to serve as a free substitute for therapy – Courtney Barnett: Tell Me How You Really Feel
Most likely to make Blake Shelton shake in his boots (and regret the day he walked away) – Pistol Annies: Interstate Gospel
Most likely to inspire you to start a band with your buds – Hinds: I Don’t Run
Most likely to never live up to “Electric Feel,” but I guess we can’t complain – MGMT: Little Dark Age
Most likely to cause self-doubt and confidence simultaneously – The Beths: Future Me Hates Me
Most likely to cause a ripple in time and space – Post Animal: When I Think of You in a Castle
Most likely to strike pop/rock gold while donning a red tracksuit – Caroline Rose: LONER
Most likely to calmly drink all the alcohol in the hotel room mini bar during the apocalypse – Father John Misty: God’s Favorite Customer
Most likely to make millennials dressed like Clint Eastwood shed a tear – Mitski: Be The Cowboy
Most likely to save the planet with jaw-dropping, norm-shattering artistry – Janelle Monae: Dirty Computer
Most likely to provoke grand spiritual hallucinations – Amen Dunes: Freedom
Most likely to become the only great country-psych-pop-disco crossover – Kacey Musgraves: Golden Hour
Most likely to be a spa day substitute – Beach House: 7
Most likely to incite political protest and also dance moves – Natalie Prass: The Future and the Past
Most likely to have license plate that reads “IDGAF” – Cardi B: Invasion of Privacy
Most likely to slay with young adult angst – Snail Mail: Lush
Most likely to summon a deep, guttural roar, followed by a gentle breeze – Neko Case: Hell-On
Most likely to go into battle with a flower-filled rifle – Iceage: Beyondless
Most likely to spark fantasies about a happy married life on a ranch in the country – Adrianne Lenker: abysskiss
