Laura Dern Claims to Have Seen Baby Yoda at a Basketball Game and We Have So Many Questions

If the holiday season and, you know … (*gestures at everything*) … somehow hasn’t already turned your brain into soup, this hard-hitting news bulletin sure will. Baby Yoda, the criminally adorable alien who isn’t actually Yoda, but merely a young member of his unspecified species, is the breakout star of Disney+’s The Mandalorian, and he’s impossible to ignore nowadays, not that we would ever for one moment want to do that. The latest verse in the perpetually delightful ballad of Baby Yoda comes to us courtesy of the equally lovable Laura Dern, whose turn as the purple-haired Admiral Holdo was a highlight of Rian Johnson’s Star Wars: The Last Jedi. Asked by Variety’s Marc Malkin whether she’d had the honor of looking upon the glorious Baby Yoda, Dern gave a truly mystifying response that we’re going to bold and block quote just so you can pore over every reason-defying word of it:

Yes, I did. Just today. I don’t know but I think he was at a basketball game. That’s all I’m going to say. I think I saw him at a basketball game. It was NBA.

We have—conservative estimate—9,000 questions. Here are the main ones: