Financial Archpriest Trump Shall Lead us Closer to State of Tax-Free Nirvana

New details are emerging almost every hour about the upcoming tax proposal—to be unveiled today—that most high president Donald Trump shall present to Congress when he descends from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. Here are some of the most fun bits:

—Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin says that it will be the “biggest tax cut in history.”

—It will lower business tax rates from 35 percent to 15 percent, and that’s not just for small businesses, but for the largest corporations as well. That 15 percent also applies to so-called “pass-through entities,” such as hedge funds and, um, real estate empires, that currently pay individual tax rates at 39.6 percent.

—That trillion-dollar infrastructure plan? Not happening.

—A tax on imports, to raise some of the funds lost with the tax cuts? Not happening.

—Oh yeah, it will also supposedly make taxes easier and save middle class people a pittance. Great.

Personally, I’m just really excited for America to follow the path of Sam Brownback’s Kansas experiment, which has worked incredibly well. When you drain the federal government of income, what can go wrong, other than being forced to cut programs to make up for the new deficit…programs which will inevitably be domestic and social, because god forbid we cut military spending. After all, who doesn’t want to live in a nation “mired in a self-created fiscal hell”?