It’s a tale as old as time itself: Chris Christie shut down a beach and then lounged on that beach with his family. Then the press caught him and he lied about it. Then he said that it wasn’t a lie. Then he said that if people want to use the beach, they should run for governor. Then he tweeted that most of New Jersey’s beaches are still open for the public’s enjoyment, posting a photo taken by the same photographer who snapped him sunning it up on the taxpayer’s dime. Then everyone on Twitter joked about it. Then we compiled those jokes here. Just another day in the big beautiful world!
chris christie is doing self care on the beach and doesn’t owe you shit! also i accidentally tweeted “children sport” trying to post this
— RusticBaller (@ByYourLogic) July 2, 2017
The image of a grotesque Chris Christie sunning himself on an empty state beach he closed is an evocative metaphor for our era of politics pic.twitter.com/TCZbXn17nx
— Dan “TBONE” O’Sulliv (@Bro_Pair) July 2, 2017
chris christie looks like a child’s drawing of the hamburglar
— crissy (@crissymilazzo) July 2, 2017
It’s kind of amazing how much Christie just owns being an awful person https://t.co/LsSLOo50OM
— Patrick Wyman (@Patrick_Wyman) July 2, 2017
stop comparing Christie to Tony Soprano. Tony was charismatic, a clever manager, and fucked like a champion
— RusticBaller (@ByYourLogic) July 2, 2017
Christie didn’t fuck up. He knows he’s done, and he hates you, all of you, and he’s having some fun while he can
— chris hooks (@cd_hooks) July 3, 2017
if you’re eating out in a restaurant, Chris Christie can legally eminent domain your french fries and everyone in NJ just accepts this
— maura quint (@behindyourback) July 3, 2017
According to Google Images, these are the photos that are visually similar to the Christie pic: pic.twitter.com/iRPVBHrhBg
— Carolina A. Miranda (@cmonstah) July 3, 2017
???????????????????????????????? NJ dot Com ???????????????????????????????? pic.twitter.com/M2pr5JCxP8
— Tom Scocca (@tomscocca) July 3, 2017
poor chris christie pic.twitter.com/0HTaCgUpgI
— KRANG T NELSON (@KrangTNelson) July 3, 2017
what the hell. Chris Christie has now made it illegal to play a saxophone in a run-down shore town that’s seen better days, what is he doing
— slackbot (@pareene) July 3, 2017
I downloaded an app just to see what that Christie photo will look like when I commission it to be painted in oils – so gorgeous pic.twitter.com/nAupigN8Ov
— Karen Kilgariff (@KarenKilgariff) July 3, 2017
Chris Christie is governing exactly like a movie politician whose evil administration is about to be taken down by a dog
— Jason O. Gilbert (@gilbertjasono) July 3, 2017
— darth:™ (@darth) July 3, 2017
whatever you say about chris christie will never hurt him as much the fact as bruce springsteen, his favorite musician, hates his guts
— anthony (@Tony_Showtime) July 3, 2017
Chris Christie already looks Iike how a Gilded Age political cartoonist would have depicted him
— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) July 3, 2017
Chris Christie sunning himself on a closed…….bridge??!?
— sick transit, gloria (@samknight1) July 3, 2017
Christie:Whatya thinking about?
Trump Jnr:…..stuff pic.twitter.com/4umGbujCbk— St Peter (@stpeteyontweety) July 3, 2017
Why does every Chris Christie scandal sound like it happened in the 1920s.
— Jesse McLaren (@McJesse) July 3, 2017
Refugees created by US Politics and Incompetence often left stranded and homeless in international tragedy. pic.twitter.com/O5oQXhdS4h
— DPRK News Service (@DPRK_News) July 3, 2017
Chris Christie shuts down Medieval Times, forces locals to joust for him
— Brandy Jensen (@BrandyLJensen) July 3, 2017
For the record, I think Chris Christie size jokes are cruel and lazy, and he shouldn’t have made one by needing to occupy an entire beach.
— Kibblesmith ?? (@kibblesmith) July 3, 2017
Chris Christie’s defense for lounging on the beach while it was closed was telling people to run for governor so they could do it too pic.twitter.com/3IFmfUAfoW
— maple cocaine (@historyinflicks) July 3, 2017
Happy July 4th weekend, LA! Friendly reminder that our beaches are open to the public…and always accessible on foot, bike, or transit ???????????? https://t.co/l6hqS8TSvY
— VisionZeroLA (@VisionZeroLA) July 3, 2017
Chris Christie is The Grinch Who Stole The 4th Of July From New Jersey.
— Alejandro Kolleeny (@AleKolleeny) July 3, 2017