The Best Halloween Horror Nights Houses of 2024

The Best Halloween Horror Nights Houses of 2024

Halloween Horror Nights started earlier than ever at Universal Orlando Resort this year, kicking off a few days before Labor Day. That’s right: August is officially Spooky Season now, which probably makes sense in Florida, as its Octobers usually feel like most other states’ August. The latest installment of Universal’s best-in-class fright fest runs on select nights through Nov. 3 and once again features 10 haunted houses, four of which are based on movies or other IP, and six of which are original concepts created by Universal. Lately they’ve been doing an equal five and five of IP and original houses, and as somebody who usually prefers Universal’s new concepts over the book report style houses that tend to result from IP, I’m glad to see them leaning into the new stuff. That didn’t automatically make this year better than the last few, though; Halloween Horror Nights 33 is more consistent than usual, with no truly disappointing houses, but it also doesn’t quite reach the artistic highs of the last few years. There’s no Dead Man’s Pier: Winter’s Wake this year, is what I’m saying. A couple of houses come close, though, and with one of the IP houses Universal has maybe hit new heights in actual scares. I’ve always been more of a theming and design guy, less interested in frights than in how cool these spaces look, and that remains true this year, when the consensus scariest house of the lot doesn’t even crack my personal top five. Let’s not jump the gun, though. Read on to find out what I liked or disliked about all 10 haunted houses at this year’s Halloween Horror Nights.

10. The Museum: Deadly Exhibit

I’m all in on this concept. A museum of folklore is hosting a new exhibit of the recently rediscovered Rotting Stone, a rock with a medieval legend about bringing blight and destruction to all that surrounds it. Of course it’s more than just a legend, and everything in the museum, from its collection to its employees to its furnishings, are twisted into evil beings dedicated to tearing you apart. Sadly the actual design of this would-be museum leaves a lot to be desired; it doesn’t do enough with the museum idea, and the various monsters that jump out at you feel generic and uninspired. Even a killer desk, which Universal hyped up beforehand, falls flat; other visitors in my group thought it was a normal monster and not a piece of bloodthirsty furniture, which shows how muddled the finished product is.



9. A Quiet Place

I expected one thing from a haunted house based on A Quiet Place: quiet. There’s not a lot of that here, though, with various alarms and noises and clattering going on throughout the house. It squeezes the first two movies into a single walkthrough, but little makes sense if you haven’t seen them; you wouldn’t even know the aliens respond only to sound going solely through what the house communicates. Some of the sets are impressive, but the story is opaque, the monsters aren’t particularly threatening, and the whole house generally doesn’t leave an impression. It’s a good gig for bearded scare actors, at least. 


8. Universal Monsters: Eternal Bloodlines

It pains me to say this, but this year’s Universal Monsters house is a letdown. Typically one of the best houses of any year, this year’s bit of classic monstrosity focuses on an entirely female cast, with Saskia Van Helsing and the Bride of Frankenstein teaming up to take down the Brides of Dracula, the She-Wolf of London, and the mummy Anck-Su-Namun. Universal Monsters houses are known for their excellent design work, and although there are definitely some great sets in Eternal Bloodlines, it doesn’t have a major, defining set piece like other houses have had in the past. Worse, it does a poor job of telling its story; a major character dies in the end, and the only I or anybody else in my group picked up on that is because our guide told us after leaving the house. Universal Monsters houses are usually among the richest HHN has to offer, both narratively and aesthetically, but Eternal Bloodlines can’t keep that tradition going.



7. Insidious: The Further

 

And here’s where our opinions probably diverge. Insidious seems to be the consensus best house of the year, scoring top marks for its no-nonsense commitment to scaring the life out of people. I’ll be honest: when I started thinking about my ranking less than an hour after getting back to my hotel room, I could only remember three things about the Insidious house: a big red door at the beginning with a poem that sounds like lyrics to The Go-Betweens’ “Bye Bye Pride,” a couple instances of that old trick of having a room filled with mannequins and one or two actual actors, and a room playing Tiny Tim’s “Tiptoe through the Tulips.” (Apparently people now know that as “the Insidious song”? News to me.) And it was one of the last two houses I did that night; it should’ve been fresh in my memory, but instead I could barely remember it at all. That’s what happens when a house cares far more about scares than cool sets or striking design. (It also probably doesn’t help that I’ve never seen an Insidious movie.) Other than that massive red door that you walk through at the start of the house and the Tiny Tim room, there’s not much to this house other than jump scares, which you’ll find a dozen or two of in every Halloween Horror Nights house. Everybody loves this house, but I just don’t see it. 




6. Triplets of Terror

When the Barmy triplets turned nine they slaughtered their parents during their birthday party and then disappeared. Every 10 years they show up again in a new town and recreate their crime at a random victim’s house. They seem to completely disappear between these murders, with no sightings or records of where they live. That’s the story behind Triplets of Terror, a gruesome house that feels like it’s based on some sordid old slasher film that doesn’t actually exist. From here on out I would say every house on the list is good, but Triplets comes in behind the rest due to a few odd storyline beats (why does Junior, the one boy out of the three, start to look not old but outright zombie-like in the later vignettes?) and some hackneyed choices (one of the daughters wears a pink bunny mask and tutu at every murder, and that whole “cute thing is actually creepy” just feels played out). Still, it’s a well-designed house with a strong idea, striking main characters, and lots of environmental storytelling, making it a very fine house indeed.


5. Monstrous: The Monsters of Latin America

A flamboyant and theatrical La Muerte, a representation of Death itself, is our tour guide for a series of grisly meet-and-greets with evil and horrifying Latin American legends. El Silbon, which means The Whistler, looks like a mash-up of Freddy Krueger and the Crypt-Keeper; hearing his whistle is basically a death sentence, but only if it sounds far away. In this house you’ll run into him a handful of times before moving on to the next brutal legend. Tlahuelpuchi, meanwhile, is a Mexican vampire witch that resembles some kind of man-vulture hybrid, whereas La Lechuza is a towering owl beast with the cry of a human baby. A large Lechuza animatronic might be the single most impressive part of Halloween Horror Nights 33. Despite a gorgeous set and creatures, there’s not much to the story here—it’s almost like a zoo for Latin Cryptids. Still, it looks amazing, which puts it high on this list.



4. Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire

I haven’t seen either of the last two Ghostbusters movies, but you don’t have to to enjoy a haunted house based on them. The latest house tackles Frozen Empire with some of the biggest and most elaborate sets of the year. You get to visit Ray Stantz’ occult book store, an ice-covered New York City, and even Ghostbusters HQ itself, with scare actors playing major characters from both the original and modern movies, including a ghost-busting Annie Potts lookalike that puts a big old exclamation point on the whole thing. It’s not all that scary, but it is full of adorable little Stay Puft marshmallow men crawling on almost every open inch of the sets, including some whose heads and arms move.


3. Goblin’s Feast

Goblin’s Feast isn’t afraid to get nasty and grotesque—after all, it is about a community of goblins who come together to eat their favorite delicacy, human flesh (you know, that stuff you’re covered in?). More importantly, it also isn’t afraid to be funny, which, when done well, almost always makes for a great Halloween Horror Nights house. With its intricately laid out underground goblin town (complete with a glorious dive bar) and smattering of storefronts, Goblin’s Feast parodies the mundanity of real life through a comic horror vision with a genuine class consciousness. Most of the goblins speak with a blue collar Cockney accent are almost always working to find, capture, or recapture their prey; at the very end of the house, meanwhile, waiting to feast, we get a quick glimpse of a stuffed upper crust twit of a goblin, with a starched shirt, coat tails, and soft, hifalutin accent. It’s easily one of this year’s best. 



2. Slaughter Cinema 2

Has it really been six years since the original Slaughter Cinema? The unreleting passage of time is scarier than anything at Halloween Horror Nights. This sequel to one of Universal’s most popular original houses picks up right where the last left off, with each room themed after a different fictional B-movie playing a drive-in theater in the ‘70s. This year’s highlights include the day-glo ‘80s fantasia of Heavy Metal Hell 3D, with punk skeletons and metalheads banging around a black light room, and the ingenious idea of a movie about mummy strippers. (At one point I swear I heard the strip club DJ say something about one of the mummy’s “Nefertitties.”) The last Slaughter Cinema has since inspired two separate (and hilarious) yeti houses; this year’s lineup will no doubt launch some full houses of its own in the near future.


1. Major Sweets Candy Factory

Murderously disgruntled candy maker Major Sweets made his debut alongside his equally evil partner Miss Treats in a 2022 scare zone. In order to exact revenge on the town that spurned him, Sweets devised a new candy formula that would drive innocent young children to murder adults en masse. This year’s house—cute, gross,  funny, and shocking in equal measure—is a prequel that shows how Sweets tested his candy: by inviting school groups to his factory for a field trip. Chaos obviously ensues, with hell-raising little children rampaging their way through a murder spree targeting any adult in the building. Meanwhile Sweets and Treats egg them on, as a score of ‘50s music and period design trends contrast the mythical innocence of the era with the blood and gore of a modern haunted house. It’s funny, cute, disgusting, shocking, and full of little easter eggs that reward a close eye, making it my favorite Halloween Haunted Nights house of 2024.


Senior editor Garrett Martin writes about videogames, comedy, travel, theme parks, wrestling, and more. He’s also on Twitter @grmartin.



 
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