Here’s a real photograph:
That’s Gene Simmons, of the band Kiss, standing at the podium in the Pentagon’s briefing room. Yes, the same Gene Simmons who’s pretty much the creepiest guy in rock ‘n’ roll, a guy who was banned for life by Fox News for lewd jokes and harassing staff members, who had an infamously vulgar and difficult interview with Terry Gross on Fresh Air, and who, oh yeah, was sued for sexual battery by an employee of one of his restaurants just five months ago. Yes, Kiss’s Asylum is not the worst thing Simmons has ever done. Simmons is also a staunch supporter of Israel, where he was born, which might give his visit to the Pentagon some symbolic weight as Trump supposedly weighs war with Iran. The main point of Simmons’ visit was to promote service in the military, which makes sense, since he was at the Pentagon. And the White House visit isn’t surprising, because with Trump in office the only people who it’d be surprising to see in the White House are black athletes who just won a championship. So really, as fucked up as it might seem—as fucked up as it should seem—this is just entirely normal now. It’s just 2019 in action. Which means there’s also been a pretty great response to this stupidity on Twitter. Really, the only recourse in times like this (other than voting and donating money and maybe protesting) is to just make fun of everything on the internet. To paraphrase Kiss’s “Detroit Rock City,” we’ve got to laugh ‘cauze we know we’re gonna die.
Here are the best and funniest tweets about Gene Simmons’ ridiculous appearance in D.C. today.