Cooking The Simpsons: Moon Waffles

Alright, Simpsons lovers, you asked for it. The time has come to make Homer’s infamous moon waffles. Prepare yourself.
First, let’s talk about “Homer the Heretic,” a Homer-centric episode from Season 4 where our big-bellied friend gives up on religion and decides to follow his own path. You can imagine how well that goes, but it all starts nice enough on a snowy Sunday morning. Homer skips church and has what he calls “the best day of his life” while Marge and the kids freeze in the pews and barely make it home in the ice and snow. Here’s what Homer’s best day consists of:
Staying in bed
Peeing with the door open
Saying “ass” really loudly
Doing the Risky Business dance in his undies
Making his “patented space age out of this world moon waffles”
Watching football
Finding a penny
Not bad. This perfect day, plus a dream where God tells him he doesn’t have to go to church (“I usually dream about naked… Marge.”), leads Homer to drop Christianity like a healthy diet. Everyone tries to intervene, including Reverend Lovejoy and, of course, Ned. The Flanders have an action movie-style car chase as they pursue heathen Homer but don’t manage to sway his beliefs. Finally, Homer is home from church again and feeling pretty good about himself (“Everyone is stupid except me!”) when he drifts off to sleep and promptly catches the house on fire. Ned Flanders pulls him out of the burning house, winning Homer back over to Christianity.
And now back to those moon waffles. Unlike many foods featured in The Simpsons, this one comes with clear instructions directly from Homer. I’ve laid them out for you below, along with step-by-step photos. Note that if you use my recipe, I am in no way responsible for the mess that it causes (think a solid 20 minutes of cleaning your waffle iron, all the while repeatedly considering just chucking it out the back door), or the resulting product. This is a Homer creation, created as instructed. Make at your own risk.
Homer’s Patented Space Age Out of This World Moon Waffles
Ingredients:
caramel candies
waffle batter
liquid smoke
a stick of butter
Supplies:
waffle iron
toothpick(s)
Heat up your waffle iron. Open and add a handful of caramel candies. Top with too much waffle batter, and WAY too much liquid smoke. Shut the lid and step away (and maybe open a window or two).