Friends I have positively fantastic news. AppleTV+’s new eight-episode comedy series is a hilarious, life-affirming delight.
In Trying, thirtysomething couple Nikki (Esther Smith) and Jason (Rafe Spall) have been together for three years. The series’ title refers to their continued attempts to have a baby. They monitor Nikki’s ovulations cycles (the series kicks off with them having sex on a bus so they don’t miss Nikki’s ovulation window. Not a great way to start, but definitely a way to get the viewer’s attention) and try IVF where they are unceremoniously informed that the chances of conceiving with Nikki’s eggs is very unlikely given her sub-par fertility numbers. “Are you sure? I definitely feel higher than that,” Nikki says.
Nikki and Jason thus embark on a journey to adopt a child, where they are faced with one of society’s most perplexing double standards. Anyone who can get pregnant can have a baby. There are no screenings. No home visits. No forms to fill out. No one assesses your health or your habits. No classes you have to take. You just … have a baby. But the adoption process is long and arduous. They have regular visits from Penny (Imelda Staunton), the case worker assigned to assess them and issue a report. They have meet-ups with other prospective adoptive parents. They go to workshops where they are lectured on things like “oppositional defiant disorder” and “object permanence.” And, in one of the most heartbreaking scenes, have to go in front of a panel to defend that they are worthy of adopting a child.
The adoption process makes them rethink all of their life choices. For Jason that means finally apologizing to an ex-girlfriend (a lovely turn by The Good Fight’s Cush Jumbo), and consider a promotion at work. For Nikki, it makes her want to redecorate their London flat with fancy furniture and children’s toys and attend boring, erudite lectures.
Nikki and Jason’s best friends Erica (Ophelia Lovibond) and Freddy (Oliver Chris) provide the couple with insight into parenting. The show truly shines in these exchanges. Comedies like the recent Breeders on FX have demonstrated how tricky it is to walk the line of being honest about how difficult the early years of parenting are while not being utterly nasty about it. British comedies are, in general, more sardonic than American ones and can easily go to a bitter place. This never happens with Trying. Erica assures Nikki that “80%” of parenting “is making sure you have wet wipes.” Erica also laments what has become of her body since giving birth and nursing two children. “If I could have my tits on the weekend and get the kids back on Monday, I’d do that,” she laments. As the saying goes, all of these statements are funny because they are true.
Yes, comparisons to Catastrophe will be inevitable. Both shows have an inherent kindness and love mixed in with a darkly comedic and classically British take on parenting. But saying you don’t want to watch it because it’s too similar to Catastrophe would be like saying you don’t want a piece of chocolate cake because you had a slice of chocolate caramel cake yesterday. You want both chocolate cakes! Trust me.