2019’s Funniest April Fools’ Day Pranks

Today’s April 1, which can mean only one thing: today’s the day when co-workers, family members, brands, and all manner of people who should know better try to pull off some pranks. April Fools’ Day is a centuries-old tradition that somebody somewhere must’ve actually liked at some point. It’s taken a new look in the 21st century, as technology and social media have made it easier than ever to try to trick people with some good-natured japes and/or bald-faced lies. This is the time for all would-be pranksters to reveal their true despicable natures to their loved ones and office mates, unleashing their sad, desperate need to seem funny or like a good sport on the day when it’s most expected, and in a way that’s pretty much antithetical to comedy. It’s St. Patrick’s Day for jokes.

With that said, let’s count down the best April Fools’ Day pranks from 2019, recapping all the classic scrapes and hoaxes that made me incredibly thankful to be on a plane the whole time.

1. … Oh wait, there aren’t any.

That’s right: there were NO GOOD APRIL FOOLS’ DAY PRANKS TODAY. That’s because there are no good April Fools’ Day pranks, period. April 1 is like the terrible forward joke a parent shares on Facebook turned into a day. It’s SNL’s political humor transformed into a box on the calendar. It’s everything sad and depressing and listless and unfunny about the world today squeezed into a 24-hour block of interminable nonsense, as fast food companies and cable networks and other brands shamelessly groveling for attention turn social media into an even more miserable experience.

April Fools’ Day was probably awesome once. I’m sure, back when people believed in witches and devils and unmentionable creatures lurking in the dead of night, it was easy as hell to actually trick somebody this one day of the year. But this is 2019. We are a people who are simultaneously difficult to trick and yet also amazingly easy to manipulate, as is proven once again with every election and every time you catch a family member sharing Fox News or Infowars junk. When it comes to making people believe total bullshit, April Fool’s Day is basically every day for far too many people in America, and the result is currently sitting in the White House (or probably Mar-a-Lago) and tweeting threats about closing our border over a made-up emergency.

There’s nothing I’d like to do more right now than point you in the direction of some legitimate laughs. (As hard as it might be to believe, those do still exist.) April Fools’ Day is not a day for laughter, though. It’s a day for sober contemplation, to quietly reflect on the mess we’ve made of the world we live in, and try to figure out where we fit into it and how we can try to make it better. It’s not a day to believe lies from McDonald’s. You can do that the other 364 days a year (and three times a day during Monopoly). We’ll get back to jokes tomorrow, but for now, just do whatever you do to relax, sit back and think about all of the nonsense that surrounds us every single day. And then try to make it to tomorrow—we’ll be here for you.