Godzilla: King of the Monsters

Godzilla: King of the Monsters is just as impressively stupid as Kong: Skull Island, though, if this burgeoning MonsterVerse takes any cues from the forebears it now remakes steeped in exhausting CGI, increasingly “impressively stupid” is the trajectory this shared universe was bound to follow all along. What amounts to a loose remake of 1964’s Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster, pulling pieces from Ishiro Honda’s original 1954 Godzilla (David Strathairn, one of the few characters from Gareth Edwards’ 2014 reboot, shows up briefly to say the words “oxygen destroyer” as dead-seriously as possible), Michael Dougherty’s Godzilla 2 swells with too many boring human characters, competently sets up some sequels, thrives solely on its (sometimes awe-inspiring) monster fights and makes no fucking sense. So basically: pretty good Godzilla movie!
Dougherty has compared his film’s relation to Edwards’ like that of Aliens to Alien, a corollary that correctly steers one’s expectations for the sequel but shouldn’t be taken as anything more than that. As Honda’s own Mothra vs. Godzilla was to his first kaiju film—transforming a dire sci-fi tale of post-war trauma into a fantasy smorgasbord of quasi-myths, pop ballads and teensy-weensy twin monster caretakers affectionately referred to as the “Peanuts”—Dougherty’s vision ejects all serious ecological pondering for arch melodrama, eschewing all mystery for immediate spectacle. Within the first minute of the film we get a full glimpse of the giant larval Mothra spewing sticky goo all over a futuristic pseudo-governmental facility; 70 minutes later, Washington DC is under enough water to allow a high-tech battleship to float between its monuments, indulging in a satisfying bit of big budget annihilation porn for those of us fantasizing about just wiping this whole “America” experiment off the map and starting over. Whereas Edwards’ creature feature reveled in the big reveal, shrouding Godzilla in urban and meteorological artifice, Dougherty imagines a world of people no longer phased by the existence of Titans, of civilization accustomed to the apocalypse.
In the 1964 Ghidorah, one of our many human characters watches a game show in which two young boys can meet any celebrity they want to. The boys choose Mothra, so the game show hosts call upon the assistance of the Peanuts to sing for the monster’s presence, all captured on prime time television. Waving away the image of grinning pre-pubescents nervously approaching a gargantuan centipedal demigod, the character scoffs, “Not my cup of tea.” Except for a few logistical items—the three-headed Ghidorah is an unstoppable “invasive species” from space; Mothra is the guiding feminine force uniting the monsters against Ghidorah; Rodan is kind of an annoying jerk—the most salient theme Dougherty’s carried over from the original source text is that the human race can get used to anything. Ecological devastation (and the reality of climate change that now no blockbuster denies) can be tuned out if it’s not your “cup of tea,” even with boiling sea levels rising to meet you at your doorstep.
Picking up not long after its predecessor, King of the Monsters begins with a terrorist attack care of token evil guy sophisticate Charles Dance, who plays name-pulled-from-hat Colonel Alan Jonah, military man turned eco-terrorist. Jonah and his mercenary squad attack a Monarch outpost, kidnapping Dr. Emma Russell (Vera Farmiga) and her very dramatic teen daughter Madison (Millie Bobby Brown, who acts so hard she spends half the movie apoplectic in an adult’s arms) because of Russell’s invention, the “Orca,” a suitcase-sized machine that can analyze the Titans’ “bio-acoustics” and create complementary sonar-based noises to “wake” and “control” the monsters. (The movie never really clarifies what “bio-acoustics” are—sometimes they’re vocal mating calls, and sometimes they’re just like heartbeats or something? It doesn’t matter. None of this matters.) Jonah plans to rouse all discovered Titans to let them hash out their ancient differences on the Earth’s surface, vicariously decimating human civilization so that the Earth might survive despite our best efforts to render it uninhabitable.