The Funniest Democratic National Convention Tweets, Night One

Comedy Lists Democratic National Convention
The Funniest Democratic National Convention Tweets, Night One

So hey: the Democrats are having a convention!


The Democratic National Convention was LIVE tonight on YouTube (and probably also on TV too, I dunno, I was watching Lodge 49), and if you somehow missed out you can kind of track the overall shape of the thing by looking at what people were saying about it on Twitter.

Some make it sound the first night of the convention cared more about winning your conservative parents over than actually firing up the Democratic base or winning over progressives who might not trust the party. Some felt that Bernie Sanders, the aging lion of America’s progressive movement, had the most powerful speech of the night. Others were deeply impressed by Michelle Obama, who speaks so rarely but with such consistent power and conviction that she just might have the highest batting average of any public figure in the dumb recent history of this very dumb country. Others just want to make some jokes, dammit.

So maybe it hasn’t been the most inspiring convention so far. Maybe a candidate like Joe Biden, who’s been in national politics for 48 years, is fundamentally incapable of exciting the youngest and most passionate members of a political party. Maybe that’s why the Democrats should’ve focused more on the future of the party, and less on establishment Republicans who dislike Trump. (For real, who would be shocked if Mitt Romney made a surprise run-in on the DNC at this point?) Maybe this whole thing will backfire spectacularly, alienating left-wing voters while failing to sway any independents or anti-Trump Republicans.

Oh, shit.

Well, mark us down (and by “us” I mean solely “me”) as those who feel this election is way too serious to find any reason to not vote for the non-Trump option. Let’s get back to normal shitty American politics and not the obscene clown show of destruction and vulgarity that’s been slowly killing us these last four years! A vote for Biden/Harris is a vote for a tolerable level of daily stress over how messed up our country is, and not the cosmic overload we’ve had to struggle through since 2017.

These tweets are funny. Read ‘em. Follow the people who wrote ‘em. And check back tomorrow for day two of this utter nonsense.

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