The Funniest Democratic National Convention Tweets, Night TwoScreen cap from YouTube Comedy Lists Democratic National Convention
Rhode Island stole the show at the second night of the 2020 Democratic National Convention. Proudly touting one’s state as having the best calamari when you’re supposed to be nominating a presidential candidate will do that. Add in the dude with the DEEP local accent name-checking a governor whose name sounds like something Peter Wolf would’ve scatted in the intro to “Must of Got Lost” and the chef repping a joint named Iggy’s, and you’ve got a gorgeous tableaux that reveals the true nature of a place. I loved it.
The virtual roll call was the highlight of a night marked by some controversial speaker choices. More Republicans showed up, including somebody that is probably kinda sorta a war criminal, and one of the key speakers is a dude (and former Democratic president!) who would be best off keeping a low profile in the post-#MeToo era. Or maybe just going to jail? I dunno.
That roll call of states was legitimately powerful, though. I’m pretty sure I haven’t veered between tears and laughs so much since the last time I got drunk earlier this afternoon. The combination of absurd local boosterism, a la the Rhode Island clip, and the diverse snapshot of a real America desperate for change simply to survive, along with references to tragedies and successes both recent and long ago, created an emotional whirlwind in my rummed up brain. When tempered by the fear that all of this excitement and fire will be for naught as Trump somehow continues to serve as president past next January, the end result was one fairly raw dude cry-laughing into his Cuba libre.
Anyhow. Tweets. Twitter. Jokes. Yep.
People tweet about things like political conventions because people tweet about everything. Some of those tweets are funny. Some are funny because they’re ridiculous. Some are funny because they call out something sad, dangerous, pathetic, or absurd. Some aren’t actually all that funny but get so many damned likes and retweets that it would feel weird to not include ‘em in a survey like this. Either way all of the tweets below—this specific subsection of the vast online dialogue about this second and most recent night of the 2020 Democratic National Convention—certainly exist. Check ‘em out, follow the tweeters, don’t give up hope, or do, it’s 2020, do what feels best.
I heard that Colin Powell was going to speak tonight but that could just be false intel.
— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) August 19, 2020
The literal Iraq War is headlining the DNC
— Rhea “Defund Police” Butcher (@RheaButcher) August 19, 2020
And now the DNC would like to welcome to the stage everyone no longer welcome at the RNC
— Dan Telfer (@dantelfer) August 19, 2020
BREAKING: that awful lady who did finger guns at the abu ghraib human pyramid will address the DNC tonight.
— josh androsky (@ShutUpAndrosky) August 18, 2020
CEO of Quibi – gets a full speech
AOC – gets one-tenth of a Quibi
— Sean Thomason (@TheThomason) August 18, 2020
here is a preview of my dnc speech –
“it’s time for america to stop being “stuck between stations” [does an air guitar riff to hold steady song] and start going “station to station” [lip synchs the bowie song for seven minutes]”
— Um, Frickin’ Alex much? (@AlexFirer) August 18, 2020
why do the republicans get two conventions https://t.co/qzL4rURcGD
— Erin GARGAMEL Ryan (@morninggloria) August 18, 2020
“Folks, we all know that America has never been greater than it was in 2003. Hey Ya. Chapelle’s Show. Return of the King. Von Dutch trucker hats. Well, I’m gonna take us back there. I’m Joe Biden, and when I’m president we’re invading Iraq AGAIN!”
— pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat) August 19, 2020
I am voting for Biden who was not my first, second, third or even twentieth choice and I will be holding my nose when I do it. He’s a shit sandwich without glass! I am very cool and anti-establishment which is the only point of me tweeting this when no one cares.
— Desi (@DesiJed) August 18, 2020
“Hi, I’m Pete Buttigieg, and everyone at Vaulter is fired. Clean out your desks” pic.twitter.com/ypS9oitFge
— Jason O. Gilbert (@gilbertjasono) August 19, 2020
1) The remote roll call vote is an amazing success and they should do it every year.
2) Gimme da Rhode Island calamari pic.twitter.com/cfD7Gc8Dib
— Aaron (@BobbyBigWheel) August 19, 2020
The calamari comeback state of rhode island is the best sentence uttered on any live broadcast ever
— Alex Kack (@Alex_Kack) August 19, 2020
“We the state of Rhode Island….” pic.twitter.com/1uUIeV6ST2
— Benjy Sarlin (@BenjySarlin) August 19, 2020
Nevada: Trump has had people buried here. You don’t even want to know. We need Joe Biden!
— Elie Mystal (@ElieNYC) August 19, 2020
virtual roll call is the most any of us have traveled in months
— Tanya Sichynsky (@tanyasic) August 19, 2020
The calamari looked delicious. pic.twitter.com/haXKG5xEBM
— Jason Gore (@sonicdork) August 19, 2020
if you travel to an uninhabited planet and start saying something about joe biden three guys will somehow pop out of nowhere to let you know trump is worse
— C’mon man (@InternetHippo) August 19, 2020
Ok someone ~20 years younger than you telling you they’re “proud of you” cannot be interpreted in any non-own way https://t.co/uC5ZLfy8eD
— eli yudin (@eliyudin) August 19, 2020
Bill Clinton could rape someone in the middle of Fifth Avenue and he wouldn’t lose any speaking gigs.
— Marie Connor (@thistallawkgirl) August 18, 2020