Some yahoos on Twitter claim they have investors ready to fund a remake of The Last Jedi and are looking to crowdsource the screenplay. I’m just coming right out and laying that down in as clear and straight-forward a manner as possible because there’s really nothing you can add to that. Yep.
Okay, I don’t think they’re for real. They’re putting up a good front right now, acting like they’re totally serious about this stupidest possible idea, despite all the legal issues that surrounds intellectual property rights and what not, and despite the fact that the real Last Jedi got good reviews and made tons of money and didn’t seem to be especially hated by people outside the deepest, angriest, most sealed off Star Wars fan sites. Maybe I’m extending too much respect to the strangers of the internet (I really should know better) but something seems intentionally, knowingly off about this whole thing, and the fact that big time Hollywood bud Seth Rogen spent some of what I imagine to be his limited free time interacting with this account also makes me think this isn’t entirely on the level.
Anyway. It is a thing that exists, and there’s no indication yet that it’s not legit, and it’s such an absurd idea fully ignorant of how the real world works that of course it’s kicked off some fine Twitter discussion. It might feel somewhat negligent to spend any amount of time thinking about Star Wars movies and the creeps who love-hate them right now, what with our world coming apart in a half-dozen or so ways every day, but at the same time we need all the levity we can get at times like these. And if that means making fun of the surely-they’re-not-serious “fans” who feel entitled to ownership over these movies like they’re Kenner dolls from 1982, well, so be it. So here are the funniest tweets about that ridiculous fan “remake” of The Last Jedi.
extremely Jay Leno voice “Some people online wanna remake The Last Jedi, that new Star Wars movie from last year. You hear about this?” Kevin Eubanks laughs, nods “They tracked down the guy behind the Twitter, and he said, Trump impression ‘Yeah I’ll make a Space Force!’”
1. Leia and Holdo kiss 2. Luke = more crotchety 3. Kylo Ren and Rey sing a funny duet about becoming friends in their mind-link set to a montage of Rey pissing off the nuns 4. Kylo Ren actually never wears a shirt now and is wider every scene
— Kivan, King of Cups (he/him) (@KivaBay) June 21, 2018
OUR TEAM OF PRODUCERS IS OFFERING TO COVER THE BUDGET FOR A REMAKE OF THE LAST JEDI IN ORDER TO SAVE STAR WARS THIS ISN’T A JOKE WE’RE READY TO HAVE THE CONVO NOW! pic.twitter.com/moussYorT4
We’re all going to dunk a lot on that Remake The Last Jedi thing today, but let’s not lose sight of the fact that the people behind it are incredible doofuses with no idea what they are talking about.
The guys who want to remake THE LAST JEDI are clearly deranged. However my plan to remake GYMKATA is very real and serious. In this 325-part Twitter thread I will lay out exactly how I play to
the thing about the last jedi is that it’s an entire film of amazing “wouldn’t it be cool if THIS happened” fan ideas, but the reason those miserable dorks complain is that almost all of those amazing things are done by women
Ok, how about this, they pay for a The Last Jedi remake, and it’s exactly the same but all the actors have to make their own laser and lightsaber noises.
SEQUELS THAT NEED DO-OVER REMAKES MORE THAN “THE LAST JEDI”: – X-Men: The Last Stand Men in Black II Speed 2: Cruise Control TMNT III Rocky V Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice Dumb and Dumberer – The “Look Who’s Talking” where they get a bunch of dogs
Was watching an upcoming title for @80sAllOver and trying to imagine a world in which Robby Benson’s screen test for Luke Skywalker ended up winning him the role, and somehow, it’s less awful than the world shaped by the awful STAR WARS fans right now.
I gotta be honest: I actually WANT a $200 million remake of THE LAST JEDI written, produced, directed by and starring amateurs. I can think of no quicker way to demolish people’s fantasies that they can do this kind of thing just as well as the professionals.
Disney halts production of all non-Salcious Crumb-based Star Wars movies, plans to release 400 Salacious Crumb movies in 2019. “I love that ugly motherfucker. I’m horny for him!” says CEO Bob Iger
— popular comedy account “the pixelated boat” (@pixelatedboat) June 20, 2018
