Starburst Will Release an All-Pink Pack, Creating a Truly Perfect and Just World

With all of the injustice surrounding us, it’s encouraging to know that there is still some good left in this world. There’s got to be some give and take, right? A yin and yang, if you will. Well, such a balance has come to fruition: Mars has announced that they’re releasing a Starburst All Pink pack of their deliciously juicy, chewy candy. Why is this good news, you may ask? That’s a stupid question, and you should leave. Everyone knows that strawberry (who are we kidding, it just tastes like pink) is everyone’s favorite flavor, you lemon-loving fool.

But alas, as good things come, so must they go, quickly into the night to remind our fickle hearts to appreciate a good thing while it’s here. This is a limited-edition packaging, only available in the month of April. So readers, gird thy loins and prepare thyselves for mad throngs of individuals who truly know what good things are, as they ravish the shelves of any Starburst All Pink packages. And be sure to be among them, tasting the sweet fruits of good taste rewarded and a life well-lived.

Check out Starburst’s Twitter announcement below. Starburst All Pink will brighten up shelves for a limited time in April, and then we’ll wait quietly for the world to right itself again, dreaming of a Promised Land where Starburst All Pink flows like milk and honey.

IT’S TRUE! All pink packs are real, and they’re fabulous. #iampinkstarburstpic.twitter.com/JypKvcXSGb

— Starburst (@Starburst) March 7, 2017