The Nuttiest Looks at the Rio 2016 Opening Ceremony

Olympics Lists Rio 2016
The Nuttiest Looks at the Rio 2016 Opening Ceremony

At any given Olympics’ opening ceremony, the overwhelming majority of countries send their athletes out in a respectable blazer and slacks – and then every so often someone comes out in something completely bonkers. We applaud those countries and their commitment to wearing something wacky—and judge them of course. Below, a roundup of the weirdest looks from Rio 2016’s Opening Ceremony.

Tonga

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Tonga, Tonga, Tonga. When you’re a small country few have ever even heard of, you have to pull out all the stops. And so the Polynesian island of Tonga took its moment in the spotlight to send out a greased-up taekwondo star Pita Nikolas Taufatofua. Were the other Tonga athletes even wearing clothes? We can’t remember.

Portugal

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Someone from the Portuguese Olympic Committee must have gotten a great deal on a truckload of distressed, patchwork jeans from 2006. There is no other explanation for the travesty of denim the country trotted out at the opening ceremony.

Austria

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It’s hard to tell from a distance, but is Austria wearing suede lederhosen? In a weird combination of sport and tradition, the athletes paired their lederhosen-looking capris with chunky sneakers. A missed opportunity if you asked us; if you’re going to wear lederhosen, you’ve got to go FULL lederhosen.

Norway

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Red, white and blue is easily the most boring color combination, partly because it’s so ubiquitous among countries’ flags. Norway, wanting to stand out in a crowd, put its graphic design team to work to send out an eye-searing white jacket patterned with red and blue boomerangs. Hey, you can’t say they’re afraid of some pattern.

Ireland

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From a distance, Ireland’s color-blocked tracksuits look like a onesie – but alas, they are actually separates. Why you would design something with the frumpy look of an adult onesie, but without the comfort and convenience of an actual onesie, we’re not sure. If you’re going to make your Olympians look like overgrown toddlers, at least let them be comfortable.

Indonesia

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About 90 percent of the Olympic Opening Ceremony looks involve blazers (a rough estimate). So Indonesia says, if you want a blazer, we’ll give you a BLAZER. All the other countries in their safe navy and khakis must have felt embarrassed after seeing Indonesia’s emblazoned red and white jackets.

Czech Republic

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Fun fact: The Czech team also works as a barbershop quartet. They moonlight with Team Australia in their matching seersucker blazers.

China

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Red and yellow are beautiful colors, but not when they are interpreted in shades of ketchup and mustard on a mass scale. Doesn’t anyone in China know about the dreaded ketchup and mustard combination? Why didn’t anybody tell them?

Poland

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We want to applaud anyone’s attempt to break away from navy blazers and khakis, but… we’re sorry, Poland, we cannot sign off on these pastel, pleated maxi skirts and cropped white jackets. Save them for when you’re vacationing in Florida.

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