Trump Boasted That North Korea Agreed to “Close Up a Major Test Site.” Now We Know Why

Let’s begin in a place where all news seemingly begins these days: Donald Trump’s decomposing pea brain.

North Korea has agreed to suspend all Nuclear Tests and close up a major test site. This is very good news for North Korea and the World – big progress! Look forward to our Summit.

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 20, 2018

A message from Kim Jong Un: “North Korea will stop nuclear tests and launches of intercontinental ballistic missiles.”
Also will “Shut down a nuclear test site in the country’s Northern Side to prove the vow to suspend nuclear tests.” Progress being made for all!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 21, 2018

Sleepy Eyes Chuck Todd of Fake News NBC just stated that we have given up so much in our negotiations with North Korea, and they have given up nothing. Wow, we haven’t given up anything & they have agreed to denuclearization (so great for World), site closure, & no more testing!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 22, 2018

Now, back to reality. Per the South China Morning Post:

North Korea’s mountain nuclear test site has collapsed, putting China and other nearby nations at unprecedented risk of radioactive exposure, two separate groups of Chinese scientists studying the issue have confirmed.

The collapse after five nuclear blasts may be why North Korean leader Kim Jong-un declared on Friday that he would freeze the hermit state’s nuclear and missile tests and shut down the site, one researcher said.

One group of researchers found that the most recent blast tore open a hole in the mountain, which then collapsed upon itself. A second group concluded that the breakdown created a “chimney” that could allow radioactive fallout from the blast zone below to rise into the air.

So there you have it, folks. Proof that under the Trump Administration, the United States is being treated like a North Korean-style government. They’re handing us propaganda “victories” that our tinpot dictator can take back to his brainwashed supporters as proof that their strongman is getting things done, while China, South Korea and Japan figure out how to actually solve this decades-old problem. North Korea didn’t “close up a major test site” because of Trump’s negotiating “skills,” but because China and other countries bordering North Korea let them know that spewing literal tons of radiation into their airspace is an unimpeachable red line. If it wasn’t clear already, it is now: when it comes to diplomacy, the United States is now seated at the kids table.

Jacob Weindling is a staff writer for Paste politics. Follow him on Twitter at @Jakeweindling.