The Right-Wing Glossary: Translate the Language of Your Favorite GOP Lawmakers!
All glossaries matter
Photo by Zach Gibson/Getty
Politicians in general tend to have complicated relationships with the truth, but Republicans in government have shown a special knack for talking their way around reality. They’re the ones who came up with the term “enhanced interrogation” to describe what most people just call torture, for example. Or look at the names they give to legislation: There’s the “Patriot Act,” which authorized such unpatriotic activities as warrantless searches and surveillance of American citizens. Or the proposed “Clear Skies Act” of 2003, a measure that would have reduced pollution controls. Just the other day, Rep. Robert Goodlatte (R-Va.) said new rules in the House of Representatives gutting the Office of Congressional Ethics would strengthen the oversight body, before the GOP caved on the change. It’s doublespeak that would have made George Orwell proud, if he weren’t horrified at the bald-faced cynicism fueling it.
Doublespeak isn’t limited to politicians, either. In our new post-factual semblance of reality, right-wingers have embraced euphemistic ways of expressing some dark shit. As we slide into four years (at least) of rampant disinformation and outright propaganda, here’s a helpful—though by no means exhaustive—glossary matching what they say, with what they mean.
What They Say—What They Mean
All Lives Matter—Except black ones.
Black Lives Matter—Please, we’d never say that.
Alt-right—Racism, but with social media skills.
Capitalism—Making as much money as possible at your expense.
Climate change skepticism—Science is hard.
Conflict of interest—No such thing.
Drain the Swamp—Hire a bunch of super-rich white guys philosophically opposed to the missions of the federal agencies they’ll be running.
Electoral College—Bulwark of democracy for when Republican presidential candidates lose the popular vote.