Castle: “Smells Like Teen Spirit” (Episode 6.15)

Things got very Paranormal Activity-ish very quickly on last night’s episode of Castle. In the middle of a face-time chat with friends (whom she greets with the all-too telling phrase, “Hey, bitches”) a prep school girl is suddenly thrown about by an unseen force and killed. Although her friends witness the whole ordeal, they keep the news to themselves when questioned by Team Caskett, afraid of sharing information about the prestigious school they all attend, which somehow relates to the murder of their friend, Madison Beaumont.

The case is made all the more interesting because Castle was a former scholarship kid at this fancy institution, and starts having some serious detention flashbacks upon entering those hallowed halls. A little investigation shows Castle and Beckett that those initial Paranormal Activity vibes we were getting were off. Instead, the principal shows footage of what Castle calls “a real life Carrie.” After being bullied by the murder victim and her friends, school outcast Jordan (played by Hannah Marks) appears to use telekinesis to strike back at the ever-horrific popular girls. Well, Castle calls telekinesis and Beckett calls him crazy … until their investigation leads them to a dude floating in the air. Once she recovers from the initial shock, Beckett the skeptic returns and decides that magic and general shadiness is the only explanation. In the end, they learned that Jordan (AKA Carrie 2.0), hadn’t committed the crime, though she’d certainly wished death upon the members of the “Bitch Clique” who were torturing her.

Further investigation leads them to the Russian literature section (what is it about Russian literature?), and they discover a million-dollar stash of German bearer bonds, courtesy of Madison’s extracurricular activities.

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Amidst all of the drama, we have the cuteness that has been watching Castle and Beckett plan their wedding. And this week the couple stumbles into another major issue—somehow, after all of these years together, they do not have a song. Poor Castle has to print out the Billboard Top 100 list of most romantic love songs ever for inspiration. (They both decide against Def Leppard’s “Pour Some Sugar On Me,” so that helps.) And since the two have been spending so much time in high school, they end up reminiscing about their prom nights … or lack thereof. Rebel Becks went to a poetry slam (because, to rebels, prom is so lame), and scholarship kid Castle had gotten himself kicked out of the prep school following an elaborate cow prank. True story.

They find out that Madison had been committing some serious robberies because Jimmy Choos (even for a rich kids) are really, really expensive. And Carrie 2.0 was really backed by a very talented special effects whiz in the school (Lucas, who, actually, may have just been plain-old telekinetic as well). Unfortunately, Madison had forced the whiz kid/boy and Carrie to do some work for her. That work involved faking the video with her friends, one of whom was angry about it (and the robberies Madison forced her to take part in) enough to kill. It’s like The Bling Ring if Emma Watson’s character ended up killing someone and there had been another character with telekinesis. And once again, we are reminded of the one fact that continues to unite us all: high school is the worst.

Well, the final scene of the episode complicates this theory a bit. It’s school dance night at Faircroft Academy, and although one student is dead, and another is on her way to doing some hard time, the winter fling must go on. Castle and Beckett, obviously, must attend and as they dance in the awkward high school air, they realize that they do have a song. Sadly, it’s not Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” (which would make for such an awesome first dance). Instead, the Caskett jam is officially “In My Veins,” a sweet little acoustic track by Andrew Belle. That’ll work too.

Favorite Quote of the Episode: Isn’t it obvious? Madison made the Hulk angry. (Castle)

Shannon M. Houston is a New York-based freelance writer, regular contributor to Paste, and occasional contributor to the human race via little squishy babies. You can follow her on Twitter