Dads: “My Dad’s Hotter Than Your Dad” (Episode 1.06)
Despite still having a long way to go, this episode was a huge improvement from the last few weeks, which gives the show a little hope. It was actually funny, with the kind of great visual humor that Family Guy is known for, and the fathers’ racism was acknowledged.
In the opening scene, Eli is in a rush to get out of the house and says he needs to shower and eat. In response to that, Edna sprays Eli in the face, wipes him, and hands him a banana, saying, “Okay, you’re good to go.”
At work, Warner breaks up with one of the assistants on Eli’s behalf and pays her a settlement check so she doesn’t sue for sexual harassment. It seems this isn’t a first for Eli, and Warner tells him that he has to stop sleeping with the assistants. Eli laughs, and Warner admonishes him: “Eli, this isn’t funny. People are saying you’re sexist.” Eli responds, “Yeah, but they’re all women, so who cares?” To get a hold on this situation, Warner hires a strict, scary and mean HR woman.
At Warner’s house, his wife suggests Warner’s dad could hang out with Eli’s dad more. Crawford pulls out his day planner, a pen and paper book from 1982. When asked why he has such a book, Crawford answers “The days line up the same.” He announces with surprise that he has an opening, between 8 a.m. and 4 p.m. Walter sees a woman’s name in the book and asks who she is. Crawford answers, proudly, “You may not know this, but your old man was quite the stalker.”
The next day, at work, Warner has hired a new, middle-aged assistant, Janet. Eli is disappointed, noting that, “she looks like the woman on the pasta sauce label.” But Warner reminds him he wants nothing to do with the new HR woman. Speak of the devil, the new HR woman pops in wearing a very serious suit, gulps down a full cup of 100-degree hot coffee, yells at someone for not wearing socks and leaves. Warner and Eli are both frightened.
The dads come in, and Janet begins flirting with them. Crawford notes “she looks like the beautiful woman on the pasta sauce label.” Both men woo her. David is the first to make his move. Crawford, like his son, is more shy when it comes to women. They both take her out on a date, and both act ridiculously, the one similarity being that they each end the date asking for separate checks.
The next day, at work, the crew asks Janet who she liked more. She answers David. Warner is relieved (he doesn’t believe in office romances) until he goes home. Crawford says, “there is one person for everyone. For me, it was your mom. For your mom, it was a weightlifter.” Warner reminisces about a time when his dad asked a girl out on his behalf. Camilla notes that that is both sweet and creepy. Warner buys a bouquet of flowers and goes over to Janet’s house to ask if she would go out on a date with his father. But when he shows up, the flowers have dripped water right on his crotch area, and he begins drying it off by rubbing it. It looks highly inappropriate, and when Janet comes to the window and sees him, she shrieks in horror.
The next morning, at work, Warner is very uncomfortable and embarrassed and finds out Janet has quit, saying that Warner was leering into her house, yelling, “I’m not masturbating.” The HR woman hired to keep Eli in line is now going to get him in line.
Eli says not to worry, he’ll get Janet to drop any charges by having his dad smooth things over with her. But David broke up with Janet because she couldn’t name all the original astronauts on the Mercury mission, so that plan fails.
At the HR meeting, the HR woman pulls out numerous settlement checks signed by Warner which were made out to all the assistants. She says that he had to have been a pervert. Eli bursts in, saying that Warner is terrified of sex, and admits that all the checks from Warner were made to clean up his own messes. She dismisses Warner and puts Eli in the hot seat.
The family waits outside while Eli is in his meeting, worried because he’s been in there for a while. He comes out and says, “I got out of trouble, not really proud of how.” The HR woman comes out, says, “I’ll pick you up at eight. Don’t wear anything complicated,” and walks off.
In a weird moment, Crawford turns to Warner and says, “I don’t know how to say this, but, thank you for sexually harassing that woman for me.”
This show has been criticized for being sexist, racist and not funny. It was nice to see the episode deal with its sexism. The episode earned its laughs, and had some odd but vulnerable moments. The better dialogue allowed for the casts’ acting chops to come through. There’s still plenty of room for improvement, but it’s a start.