We know how insular this is. If you don’t use Twitter, this means nothing to you. And if you do use Twitter, there’s still a healthy amount of “who gives a shit” circling around this entire situation. The gist: after a decade of limiting tweets to 140 characters, today Twitter announced that a select group of users will be testing a new 280 character limit. So tweets can be twice as long, which will most likely mean they’ll be twice as mean and bad and unfunny as they are today. That’s Twitter.
Okay, not all tweets are bad. Not all Twitter users are Nazis. Lots of people who use the site do have strong opinions about this change, though, and here are some of the funniest reactions to the news. You’ll probably notice one particular recurring theme, which shouldn’t be a surprise, since our president almost tweeted our way into a nuclear war this past weekend.
TWITTER USERS: It would be nice if you stopped people making death threats.
TWITTER: OK, but what if those death threats could be LONGER?
— Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) September 26, 2017
RIP my favorite twitter joke: the one where you write a really absurd line and stretch it out as long as you possibly can so it hits the cha
— austin walker (@austin_walker) September 26, 2017
new twitter pic.twitter.com/PdytFtSlME
— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) September 26, 2017
You: Why doesn’t twitter fix the real problem: Nazis
Me: Why doesn’t twitter fix the real problem: the too-narrow cropping of image previews— Pixelated Boat (@pixelatedboat) September 26, 2017
BREAKING: Twitter doubles character limit to bait drunk, blathering, racist uncles into joining.
— (((Dan Ewen (@VaguelyFunnyDan) September 26, 2017
hopefully Twitter going to 280 characters will make the site work better for Russian bots who lack the art of brevity
— Matt Oswalt (@MattOswaltVA) September 26, 2017
I love how we’re like every word trump tweets could start a nuclear war and twitter is all fuck yeah let’s speed this shit up
— Sarah Beattie (@nachosarah) September 26, 2017
#280characters? Twitter is becoming a Robert Altman movie.
— Eli Braden (@EliBraden) September 26, 2017
“By increasing the character limit of a Tweet to 280, we feel like the President will be able to declare war much more easily.” – @Twitter
— New Donk Casey (@CaseyMalone) September 26, 2017
Twitter doubling the character limit means I have to unfollow half of you
— Mary Kobayashi (@MaryKoCo) September 26, 2017
Twitter needs to limit it to zero characters and give this country a break.
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) September 26, 2017
When I think of all the problems with Twitter, one that needs fixing most is being able to say twice as many slurs in one tweet
— Churlish (@Cryptoterra) September 26, 2017
ppl who wait to actually use new twitter features before complaining about them blindly are truly the feds
— Desus Nice (@desusnice) September 26, 2017
I’m glad that Twitter is allowing us to use more characters because personally I want to read a lot more awful bullshit that upsets me daily
— Allen S. Williams (@TotallyAllen) September 26, 2017
TWITTER: u asked for round avatars,
US: No we-
TWITTER: & we delivered! Then u asked for longer tweets
US: No we d-
TWITTER: Well guess what— pat tobin (@tastefactory) September 26, 2017
Please don’t change anything about Twitter change scares me and I am far too reliant on Twitter for self-esteem to ever leave
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) September 26, 2017
Us: Twitter is garbage. This place is a cesspool.
Twitter: Here are some more characters.
Us: Why would you ruin perfection?— Mark Harris (@MarkHarrisNYC) September 26, 2017
OH HOLY SHIT. I figured out what we should do with the new 140 characters.
´•..•´¯`•..•´Forum Signatures Are Back Baby`•._.•´¯`•.¸¸.•´
— austin walker (@austin_walker) September 26, 2017
Here I wrote some dumb jokes about this a couple years ago pic.twitter.com/xTpCdT7RNX
— (((OhNoSheTwitnt))) (@OhNoSheTwitnt) September 26, 2017