The Funniest Tweets of the Week
Photo by John-Michael Bond
Every week we scour Twitter for the best jokes and future libelous statements made by the current and future faces of comedy. Some of these folks want to have a career writing jokes. Others are just funnier than we’ll ever be. This week was an odd one, in a year of odd weeks. The 18th anniversary of 9/11 came about. How has time impacted the quality of 9/11 jokes 18 years after the fact? I think you’ll find for yourself with some of this week’s entries, they’ve become oddly more whimsical. If you’re offended by 9/11 jokes, don’t worry. We kept them to a minimum. But we would never forget to include them. It’s a valid form of catharsis and, most importantly, these are great jokes. Enjoy, and make sure to follow the folks who make you laugh.
tinder but it’s cats. everyone makes their cat a profile. the swiping doesn’t matter. U just. Look at cats and their interests and then look at MORE CATS
— christine lynn herman (@christineexists) September 6, 2019
In the 2000s every girl had a pop punk boyfriend who weighed 90 pounds and owed her exactly $400 dollars at all times
— Sweet Daniel, Caressed By Autumn Wind, He Is Free (@ItsDanSheehan) September 7, 2019
post malone drops new album
Girls looking for new IG captions: pic.twitter.com/JBlJ4rQw2B
— Trevor Wallace (@TrevWall) September 7, 2019
no person has ever started wearing a very specific unique hat because good shit is going on for them mentally
— jack wagner (@jackdwagner) September 8, 2019
toxic masculinity is 20% eyeing people up when they look at your girl and 80% refusing to admit that you’re lactose intolerant