It’s June now. Soon it will be summer. Whole species of birds have returned north for another season of making nests and babies and smashing into windows. Your favorite television series are wrapping up or starting anew. It’s hot. It’s getting hotter. Sprinklers are sprinkling and hoses hosing. Somewhere a dog is lying down in some shade. Have a nice nap, little doggy. Dream sweet doggy dreams. When you wake up the world will still be here, maybe, and if it’s not, let these tweets be our legacy. Except for the “covfefe” ones.
Good move for Blue Apron to file an IPO, they could only do podcasts for so long
— Calvin Lord (@calvinthelord) June 2, 2017
Rick, I’m gonna blow your fuckin mind by telling you about this thing called battery storage https://t.co/lTldbvooVJ
— Rock Strongo (@greatopinionman) June 1, 2017
I wonder why the fat 71-year-old who had to take a deep breath every three words of his speech isn’t worried about sea levels in 2030
— Hayes Davenport (@hayesdavenport) June 1, 2017
Um… does Donald Trump think the Paris Accord… is actually about Paris? pic.twitter.com/fMExBuD9Ma
— Eli Yudin (@eliyudin) June 1, 2017
“And also I represent Victorville not Versailles, so fuck that treaty. WW1 is back on baby!” https://t.co/BFhO8tnmzM
— Brooks Wheelan (@brookswheelan) June 1, 2017
wait hold on maybe republicans would reconsider if instead of “global warming” we called it “gay weather”
— josh androsky???? (@ShutUpAndrosky) June 1, 2017
Stages of a Toxic Fandom:
1. I love this
2. I own this
3. I control this
4. I can’t control this
5. I hate this
6. I must destroy this— Sam Sykes (@SamSykesSwears) June 1, 2017
the big news today is the dog rates account had to post a three paragraph apology and screen shot it for selling a hat with “covfefe” on it
— leon (@leyawn) May 31, 2017
— Mark Agee (@MarkAgee) June 1, 2017
i love humiliating my son by telling the whole world that he believed a fake photo was real, on account of how much i care about him
— kev (@kept_simple) June 1, 2017
regret to inform you all that barron trump watched Con Air and thought it was real. he is inconsolable
— j.r. hennessy (@jrhennessy) May 31, 2017
BREAKING: Comedian held to higher standard than the literal President of the United States https://t.co/BPznGUksgk
— ultra lite meme (@hawillisdc) May 31, 2017
want to talk to everyone you most admire, but in way that makes them think you’re an idiot? consider journalism
— Emily Gould (@EmilyGould) May 31, 2017
Haha ok now it’s kind of funny pic.twitter.com/paj7BbwEfT
— Kendrick LaBlart (@Hamptonyount) May 31, 2017
— Ralph Douthat (@ralphdouthat) June 2, 2017